From Riches To...

It's 6:45am

2008-02-25T03:43:00.000-08:00

I haven't 'slept' for the night....i did fall asleep for a few hours beside our little girl.....but i've been up working on my 1st score...
Well...not sure if you'd call it a score.....but it's a musical piece to accompany a video presentation....
It's for the the Olympic Association of a certain caribbean island.......
When I was asked to hop on board....instantly a track came to my mind.....one i'd done about 2-3 years ago......
It's upbeat....yet mellow...inspirational kinda.....

Just sent off the 1st draft to the producer/director..whatever you call the people who run the visual side of stuff....hoep she approves.....

so things feel like they're moving......i actually have my hands full with musical projects right now.....
In studio working on the EP....looking like a 5-6 track piece.....Toying with the name THe World Within
Initially planned it to be a solo instrumental thing...but thinking about inviting some of my talented friends (a few may be reading this) to hop on board........a singer or 2.....a DJ/beatmaker....a journalist....a 2 year old girl.....maybe even a sax player i know...:)
Plus haven't started working on a remix for a track by a new zealand group 50Hz....name of teh track is Seek Know More......the track is to appear on a new zealand tv series.......

In addition to that I'm still playingn out every tuesday night at weekenz......last week was horrible.....sound problems....was feeling low.....vibz wasn't great.....
....going to mad dem tomorrow night though.......lol

anyways.....i'm off to start the day....

Update...

2008-02-18T21:59:00.001-08:00

Since Jan15th (last blog entry) I've:
-taken a film crew from new zealand around kingston for 2 weeks
-met Yellow man, King Jammys, Sean PAul, Billy Mystic
-started transferring tracks to Pro Tools for the upcoming EP
-been eating terribly
-exercised probably 3 times
-not had more than 5 hours sleep in one night
-not gone 2 days without smoking
-been feeling better about myself
-pushed out a few new beats
-gotten a new job
-have not had sex

Change.....

2008-01-15T19:54:00.000-08:00

....was going to post this up on the myspace page but decided to keep it short over there and go into a lil more detail over on this page....

Alot's going on in my world right now.......sometimes it feels like its more than i can handle....
Sometimes i fel so 'close'...to what i don't know...but a comforting kind of closeness...and other days....like today.....i feel so far away from 'it'......lonely.....frustrated....confused....scared....

At the same time I realize this isn't a permanent state of mind...and feeling better is only a positive thought away......

These blogs are becoming less about music and more about the thoughts running thru my head....

Be warned...

Oh...i almost forgot what i was going to write about...change.....
It's a new year...i'm a year older...after living with someone for the past 4+ years....i'll be living alone...starting in another few weeks.......
I'm on the brink of a huge career shift......to me it's huge....
I'm feeling God's presence in my life more........some old friends and i seem to be outgrowing each other.......
I'm meeting new people.....but feel scared to open up to them....

Days like today i just want to curl up on a bed and be hugged......comforted.....told that everything's going to be ok...
It's days like today I ask myself..."what the fk are u doing with your life man?"....its days like today i want to be like some of those friends i'm growing apart from......want to feel secure as opposed to free........

That's something i've been thinking about alot lately after reading this book freedom vs. security.....Alot of my peers are secure....but they aren't free.....at 1st I'd be all judgemental and stuff....but walking this path i've chosen isn't easy....and i can now understand why people choose security over freedom....its easier....it's safer....
But freedom....to me is the only way.......i guess that's why I can get so low at times..cause i know i'm not there yet......
Alot of times i feel like i'm walking in the dark....with no flashlight.....looking for something.....don't even know what the fk i'm looking for....

ANYWAYS.....enough of that......
This blog has served its purpose.....I've vented....ii've released all the heavy negative self imposed doubt that has been on my back since i woke up this morning.....
Tomorrow's a new day......

I'm off now...to.....
-iron clothes for work tomorrow
-shower
-meditate
-pray
-plan tomorrow
-fall asleep beside my daughter...

g'nite

Rhythm

2008-01-12T06:26:00.000-08:00

...that word....its one fo those words I've always had trouble spelling.....To this day wheenever i write or type that word i get flash backs of my grade 5 teacher looking me in the eye and saying "spell rhythm"......yeah that word has been on my mind alot lately.....

Like i was sayin in the previous post alot hasn't changed in my life.....in the tangible....but i'm seeing things ALOT differently now.....alot....and one of the things i've become more aware of is rhythm.......
not just with respect to music....but to relationships....y'know the phases/stages they go thru....the back and forth...tit for tat shit.....the push pull dynamic.......

in society...every morning i'm in my car headed to work...and everybody else is headed somewhere....school...work...home from working last night......somewhere......and i see a rhythm in that....it's weird but its almost like a slow pulsating 'energy' that pushes us along.....we just chugging our way thru life.....for alot of us that 'energy' is a paycheck....that's all that gets us up in the morning...."gottta go get paid".......but that's another blog..

but yeah..the rhythm thing......i've also been noticing...with regards to music.....my 'own' rhythm...i put own in '' cause i don't mean it like this is my posession or whatever.....i just mean that that's the pace and the feel that feels good to me......I think we all have one....i think i've found mine.......It doesn't necessarily have to be about tempo.....its a feeling....

In an unfamiliar kinda way....it's comforting

....riches

2007-12-16T03:15:00.000-08:00

yeah......so I'm back....been all around the world and back.....
Back right where I left off....only now seeing things with different eyes....
Alot has changed in 2007....alot has stayed the same.....

One thing that's still there/here is this feeling i get when i hear what i call good music....the feeling i get when i'm grooving at 3am with my headphones on and my Trigger Finger on my lap.....tapping out sounds on the latest beat i'm workign on....

Where have i been?.....i'm not sure.....Part of me was asleep i guess.....
I'm awake now......
I feel a greater sense of responsibility and urgency now.....yet I know the plans will fall in place in due time with the right effort....

Anyways....i'm rambling.....
It's good to be back in blogland.....

Yeah

Next gear...

2007-07-15T18:36:00.000-07:00

...been back from london/barcelona about 3 weeks now....
What's different since being back home??
-the girls aren't here (they're in tobago with d's mom unitl august 11)
-i'm meditating every morning and most evenings
-i'm eating alot better
-i'm exercising more regularly
-been inviting people to the house to record on some of my tracks....been going REALLY good so far....i wish i could play some of the stuff we have down for you.....i'm excited
-i'm at a new health centre
-i'm alot more grateful....in general
-i have some new friends who are REALLY REALLY cool
-i'm happier
-i'm less self-concious
-i'm praying more
-i'm reading a bit more
-i've learnt how to make a mouth watering salad (secret ingredients include sunflower seeds and purple basil)

out...

be back sooner than u think

New week..

2007-05-27T23:02:00.000-07:00

Had a good week......hope this one is even better....
Got some music done.....wednesday was a holiday..went tobeach with D and the little one...
One step closer to Barcelona.
Oh...i didn't tell you about that???......

stay tuned

oh...new music over here

have a good one my people

I want to.....

2007-05-14T00:43:00.000-07:00

...make people feel good...
at the end of the day..that's all i want to do.....i want to do that thru this music....

Sometimes I wish i could make everybody i see on my daily journey smile and feel good about themselves......impossible??.....maybe....maybe not....

At work....i come into contact with approximately 45 strangers a day...from 2 weeks old to 91 years old...some the interaction is "hi i'm out of so and so medication....i'm here for a prescription"....others tell me their deepest/darkest secrets/fears/hopes...
...It hit me today that if i really try....if i push the poor conditions in work in aside....i can bring a smile to at least 40 people 5 days a week......

Alot of people don't have that oppurtunity to give....i do....i should be more grateful....

y'know.....since deciding that medicine is not my life's work....i've been slacking on staying on top of things medically...haven't been going to conferences....not reading up around interesting cases I come into contact with......
I haven't been being the best doctor i can be.....
I read somewhere "how u do anything is how u do everything".....and sure enough....i also haven't been being the best musician/beatmaker/producer i can be......i'm not reaching out to people in my immediate environment enough....not finishing up alot of projects i've started..simply because "i'm not feeling them".....all kinds of stuff........

If i died tomorrow....would i be proud of what I've left/done?........honestly no....
There's so much more I can be doing.......

So as of today.......it's new leaf time again.......not looking to perform any miracles...just going to be alot more thorough....more present....go the extra mile a bit more......

yes.......

Someone's probably reading this saying to themselves...."here he goes again.....starts of all inspired...soon to come tumbling again"....(or is that just that red guy with the horns and the pitchfork on my shoulder?).......well that's what life is about man......to me at least.....getting up....and starting over.....re-starting.....re-newing......re-evaluating....re-mixing.....re-freshing...re-affirming...and re-alizing....

it's 3:00am....i have to be up in 2hrs and 45mins.....(sleep is a concept...lol)

thanx for reading...

ah gone

More Random Thoughts....

2007-05-07T17:30:00.000-07:00

-rain
-warmth
-cuddle
-leaking
-landlady
-miserable
-positive
-negative
-atoms
-chemistry
-science
-religion
-both seek answers to life's questions
-approached from opposite directions
-poetry
-1st open mic
-2000
-edna manley
-nervous
-liberating
-confidence booster
-girls
-flirting
-Livity
-she knows i'm involved
-young
-pretty
-topp
-older
-pretty
-smart
-sweet
-mother
-2 years
-water birth
-barbados
-antigua
-exile
-jamaica
-UK
-Europe
-excited
-reunion
-red bull music academy
-andreya
-marsh
-bubbz
-nerko
-pascal
-beats
-collab
-freedom

...good nite

Strictly Business

2007-05-04T00:50:00.000-07:00

The time has come...the moment i feared......the day music is no longer something i do for myself....no longer something that is just about me......
I'm sending off a cd with some beats to a guy who, along with someone i met within the past year, approached me the other day to shop my beats...
They're going to submit them for placement on tv commercials, tv shows, movies....
If chosen by some music supervisor....they should offer either an upfront lump sum and buy the track...ie its theirs and they can do anything they want with it like hypnotise women to take off their tops or some shit.....or they'll pay a 'small' fee and i get sent royalty money....ie...a percentage for each time the track is played....
The guys who do the shopping get a 15% commision on whatever is offered for the track....Someone in the know told me that 15 is good, but 10 is better.....When i heard 15 initally....i thought cool..that sounds reasonable.........so i'm not going to try and drop it to 10....not now at least.....

I dunnno...part of me is excited about this step in my career, while another part is a bit sad.....
You see...the music up to this point has been all about me.....i made what i liked...what i wanted to hear i put down....yeah..i'd put some up on the myspace page....or send them to people for some feedback, but this is the 1st time I'm actually getting stuff 'out there'.....it's a weird space to be in.....it's one of the things i've dreamed about and planned for, but being here it feels weird....
I see it as me just stepping out of my comfort zone.....
I'll keep you guys posted on this....

I'm also going to send out a cd with some tracks to ALL the DJs I know...both in person and thru the internet.....If i'm really planning to make this thing my career...the music has to get out there.......

So what have i been up to lately....i hear some of you asking.....well if u know me...it's just the usual......work/home/music......I've been more at peace with my job lately....not complaining as much (don't laugh topp...it's true...check it).....i've started jogging again.....as i'd planned......may is the comeback month.......it's onlny been a week, but i'm feeling better already......more spring in my step....

A friend of D's is here in ja from the states...its her birthday on saturday so they'll be having a 'girls only weekend'......so i'll be holding down the fort with the little one on friday and saturday nite.....
Me and this llittle 1 year 11 monther will be doing some partying of our own....i'm taking her to little function at certain eating spot in new kingston.....one of the owners is having a little birthday bash......should be a nice mellow vibe......so daddy and daughter will be passing thru....

anyways...its almost 1am....have a few more things to do b4 i turn in....
nite nite folks....

Random Thoughts....

2007-04-30T18:03:00.000-07:00

.....fatigue
-at peace
-not sad....
..not exactly happy either
-anxious
-excited
-scared
-jazz
-piano
-blue screens
-weed
-jamaica
-antigua
-reggae music
-close minded
-international
-music festivals
-sonar
-london
-atlantic ocean
-thoughts
-telepathy
-Lake House
-Keanu Reeves
-Sandra Bullock
-Traffic
-Oprah
-money
-payday
budget
-organize
-adult
-responsibilities
-family
-1983
-1975
-2005
-2007
-2

....good night

"There is nothing...either good or bad...

2007-04-29T21:58:00.000-07:00

..but thinking makes it so"---William Shakespeare

I've been hearing/reading these words for years now......but I finally understand what they mean...
wow...!

i'm grateful

"I Juss a do I own thing"

2007-04-25T22:54:00.000-07:00

...the immortal words of Mutabaruka ...
My sister knows him and his wife pretty well..I"ve been meaning to link up with him for a while now......Finally did it a few weeks ago.....
NOw the plan was to just go and give him some music from my harddrive....(he DJs too by the way) and ask him to put a few Lee Scratch Perry albums on mine.......
Now if u've ever seen the man...he can come across really serious and intimidating...but he's really a light hearted man.....anyways....the man went on to give me about 10 GB of music from his harddrive....all kinds of shit...from the beatles to Jah Shaka....... Then he gives me to poems of his with no music and basically asks me to put some music to it.......
I started on on eof them.......I like it..D likes it.....but she was saying...and its true....the music was a bit off...by that i mean the keys i was playing wasn't rising and fallin with the words if u can imagine what i mean...so i was supposed to fix that up and take it for him to hear....
But man...i've been slacking.......haven't finished it up......Will start it up again tomorrow night though....

Last week was the Infosession for the Red BUll Music Academy ....basically its an advertisment for the academy to get people to apply...I got to talk about my experience in australia.....There were a few of regggae vets in the building....King Jammy for one........THere were also alot of old Rastafarian musicians there too....
Lemme side track for a bit.......It was held at tuff gong studios.....i went into the control room to ask the engineer.............

...listen i'm really tired now..had a long day...its 1:15am.....to cut a long story short....i had an interesting night at the red bull thing...i got a gllimpse of the jamaican music industry......it showed me that alot of people who make music in jamaica see the world only in terms of reggae......Now i know the importance of people like that....we need purists...that's how crafts and cultures survive........But i'm no purist...don't want to be one.......
The music i make is not reggae.....it's influenced by it...but it isn't reggae........

I'll finish this tomorrow...i'm sorry...i'm falling asleep as i type

later
me

Myspace is addictive....

2007-04-07T12:38:00.000-07:00

...new music....new blog over at:
www.myspace.com/sawandi63

...i haven't forgotten the blogger.com thing...just that myspace is alot more convenient..(i'm always on it).....
Yeah....but i do have some blogs that are too personal for myspace...and i'll be putting up one this weekend......
All in all things are good

l8r

Look over here....over here...

2007-04-04T20:00:00.000-07:00

i've been blogging a bit over here lately.... www.myspace.com/sawandi63

Radio!!!!!....Suckas neva play me!!!...not

2007-03-22T20:01:00.000-07:00

aight ...aight...I know ...i know....i'm slipping with the blogs man.....I have been....But i've been busy......
Busy working....busy playing daddy, partner, old stony hill commuter (if you live in kingston you know how busy that can make you).....
Alot has happened since the last entry....alot internally and externally......
Externally....I'm so out of shape man....my joggin/marathon training is now down to once a week IF i'm feeling motivated.......
I've decided to cut back on the jogging till April...and do some power walking up these hills man.....
I walked like 4 miles up hill last week and i'm still feeling that shit man.........So i'll be doing that till may then in may we start the OFFICIAL marathon training program for the run in december......Lance Armstrong look out....well not really...but......

Yeah...internally...i've been going thru alot of the usual battles......the 'am i really wasting my life pushing this music thing vs. setting up a private practice or going back to specialize' debate.....
No worries.....i'm not going back to the books.......i'm still in that black chair with a keyboard, laptop and midi controller in front of me....
What's been getting me down is that I haven't been in a very creative mood of late....actually i've probably done 2 beats for 2007......I like them though.....they're the new sound i'm trying to develop.....for those familiar with my stuff...the new things aren't as smooth....they're still slow, and lush, but the drums hit a bit harder....(neck snap factor)...and the basslines move a bit more (waist movin factor)......I think that's the formula right htere.....music that has some nice crisp drums.....that get the fellas bobbing their heads...scrunching their faces.....and nice heavy mobile basslines that keep the ladies dancing........Throw in some nice.......lemme stop......
But yeah..you get the picture.....Thats what i'm trying to do....

So what else has good ol seven been up to??.....Well i've been working on my DJ-ing skills....(yardie crew: no....i'm not planning to challenge Mavado at Sting '07)......DJ as in spinning records...well in my case....mp3s....
YEs....i've caught the DJing bug.......
I have marsha to thank for that....one night while she was here....we were driving home and she said to me....."you have a serious music collection man....you need to share some of that stuff yeah"..in here london/jamaican accent.......When she said it....i caught a flashback of living in the old apartment..and when D and the little one were out...i'd be balsting tracks and selecting what i thought the neighbours would love to hear next......lol......
I really do like sharing music man.......and i do have alot of stuff.......so why the hell not......
I've been given the oppurtunity to play at one of kingston's 'coolest' nite spots.....Its a 20s-late 30s crowd.......alot of hipsters.....people craving that 'different shit'......
So most nights i've been up practising different sets.....different themes.....What i thought would be the hardest part...actually mixing....is actually quite easy with the software that's available....(ahhh i see the purists fuming.....yes....i only use a laptop.....no vinyl....no turntables)......but hey......at least hear me do something b4 you judge...

In addition to the dj thing.....I've decided that I want to start my own radio show.....an hour long show highlighting music coming out of 'left field'....and not that music that jsut because it sounds different its heralded as good....the really good shit.....
So far i've lined up a monthly guest slot on a show a friend of mine has on 93FM on saturday evenings....called island vybz......
We actually had a show this past weekend....the plan was to play some music form some of my fellow red bull participants....then call them up (UK, Japan and Chile) and talk about stuff.....Technical difficulties and a sick producer kinda foiled those plans...so we ended up winging it.....we played the music and the friend interviewed me....we spoke about all kinds of stuff...music....how i go about injecting my feelings into music......the whole red bull experience........i had a blast man.....
Spoke to some poeple after and they said i sounded really good.....in terms of voice.....people have always told me I shoud read the news or do radio cause i have a 'radio voice'........
You know sometimes people say things to you so often that u can't turn away from it....well this is one of them things......
There's something about being locked up in a sound proof room...playing and talking abouot music you like...that turns me on man.......

So i'll keep you posted on that.........

Last nite i decided that although i'm not feelin particularly creative...i was going to sit down around my equipment unitl i came up with something......and guess what...i did.......i woke up with the headphones on at 4:00am this morning and aloop going over and over in my head......I saved it....shut down the computer turned off everything else...and went to bed...only to have to get up 90mins later......
I didn't even remember how the beat sounded....i just just listened to it...and its not bad.....could use some brushing up......

So tonite....(as soon as i conclude this entry).....i'm going to do the same thing...hopefully won't fall asleep around the equipment this time......

yeah...so i'm off......
Going to lock myself in that room..turn on that dim lamp.......put on my 'beat jacket'..(an adidas jacket my sister bought for me a while back)...and turn some knobs and play with some keys until something good comes out....

be good people...
talk soon

Ok..it's 1am

2007-03-06T22:03:00.000-08:00

..i'm still up....tomorrow/later is wednesday.....the ruffest day of my work week......when i leave home at 630am.....i go nonstop till 8/9pm...only break from seeing patients is the drive from mountain view to papine....

So what am i doing up i hear someone asking.....well......had an intersting night.......

Lemme back up a bit and give u the lead up...lat night i call up a friend i've been 'avoiding' for a while....not because i d on't like her or anything.....just that she has a lot going on.....and so do I....so I was waiting for that elusive 'perfect' moment when i can go up to her place..sit and talk......last night i was like...fk it....lemme just call her now and set up a time to link her tonite.....
So the plan was to link her after i leave job#2........
As I'm on my way out the gate this evening....said friend calls......says she has someone for me to meet......a german/croatitian (i know i've spelt this wrong...4give me) guy...who owns or owned a music store......has some links with some heavy hitters here......musically.......
Honestly before teh call i was about to call her and say.....V....i'm not in the mood to talk tonite..feeling really tired......

So i decide to go check my friend......get to her house...she's all dressed up....she's going to meet the guy and another friend at this bar.....we chat for a while and she asks if i want to tag along....
NOw I was dead tired..so i'm like..."sure, but i can't be out too late"....

Long story short......we get to the bar...i meet the guy....something about me and redbull music academy comes up.....the guy is GOOD friends with Mani (on the the guys responsible for organizing the academy)......it was soo weird.......what are the odds of my meeeting a german in kingston who knows one of the 6 germans i know........
Had a brief but interesting conversation........we exchanged contact info...he asked me to send him some music and he'll pass it on to some people he knows at Sony......

It's weird man......i know you guys have heard me say this many times, but everytime i get to a low point.....something like this always happens...a chance meeting....some thing that reminds me how much I love making music...and how guided I am.......Its nights like this that make me feel like i'm being directed somewhere and i'm not just floating around this life aimlessly......

So that 'chance' meeting has rekindled my fire somewhat.........i got home.....dumped the .wav files for 2 tracks I did for Royal Afrikan Soldiers......that's something i've been sitting on for weeks now......so having done that i'm feeling alot lighter now......

Yeah...so that's it.....i'm out......
going to rest up for tomorrow....

peace
me

it's really not THAT bad....(typo)

2007-03-06T14:07:00.000-08:00

..last night while ranting I typed that what i make in a month i know people who make that in half a day.....I'm sure they're people who do make that in a few hours, but I don't know any.....i ment to say in half a month......
AAhh.....a gentle reminder to not blog when you're tired and feeling low......

I've got so much trouble.....on my mind

2007-03-05T20:28:00.000-08:00

....was that what Chuck D said??....or was it...ah welll...

yeah.....its been a while...........and i do have alot on my mind....
As i've discovered...and i'm sure you've picked up by now......I don't post alot when things get 'hectic'....and by hectic i mean....when i reach a low point......
THe past few weeks have been very up and down..........the biggest thing though is that i've been really really tired......
This new commute is no joke.....
I've been working some crazy hours.....leaving home at 6 in the morn...some nights not getting back home till after 9pm.....then trying to squeeze family time, friend time, and music in the middle.....

I'm feeling a wave of complaint coming on....so i hope you guys can handle it...
First up.....work...
For the 1st time last week.......i felt i needed to leave my job....now i know i know...i've been saying this from the 1st ever blog entry...but last week it hit me.....
This job is not worth it.....yes I'm providing service for a population that doesn't have access to the 'best' health care...yes it feels good when Ms Minty* brings a bag of mangoes as a sign of appreciation for me helping her granddaughter.......yes....i do laugh to myself when Mr. Stevens* brings a small tightly wrapped package of marijuana and offers it as a token of appreciation (i refused it by the way).....
but.......in the last fefw weeks....i've been averaging like 40 patients a day man.......
I was tired one day 2 weeks ago..and wanted to take the day to work on some music with a friend visiting from the UK.......and i'm still seeing patients who came that day...because they have noone to replace me when i'm sick or cannot make it to work that day.......
On top of that....the salary is ridiculous.....i know people working privately making what i make in a month in half a day......yep.....
Thankfully there's job#2 to help boost the income a bit.....but even that's getting to me now.....they're short staffed there also....and some days I'm the only doctor that works.....Now imagine going to the health centre of a certain university here at 3pm and being the 1st doctor there for the day..........the shift should end at 8, but recently i've been leaving there mins to 9.....

At the end of the day....i'm grateful.....i have my nights and weekends.....nobody calling me out my bed at 3am to see someone in the emergency room.......
I'm just ready to step away.....and like i was telling a friend earlier....i feel that in a very peaceful way...not in a 'frantic/i have to leave now' kinda way.....

Next up music.....
My fellow redbull music acadmey participant...Marshmellow blackbird was here in JA visiting her family in the country.....We didn't get to work on much music.....lots of things played a role in that.....procrastination, fatigue, thin walls, a 3 year old laptop.....we did manage to record some vocals.....and i'm yet to finish editing them.....
I'm in the middle of working on a live show kinda thing.....just me, my laptop a midi controller and some beats.......I'm kinda excited about it and how far it could go if I execute the plans i have in my head to the T.....I'll keep u posted there....and all the people reading this in JAmaica....i'll be sending you some invites to the first gig.....
I'm also looking to start doing some radio work..........people have always told me that i have a 'radio voice'.....plus i really like playing and sharing music.....i have some ideas but need to talk to some people in the businees and see what's the best way to go about it.....I'll keep u posted there also......
I'm behind on a few projects i've started also.....just haven't had the time or the energy.......

THe car still hasn't been sorted out yet....the insurance company says all that's left to be done is for the cheque to be printed....that was 2 weeks ago.....last i checked there was still a dent in the front right side of the car.....

Honestly....when all is said and done...i'm ok......i've been feeling really excited about the future them last couple a days.....i've slowed down.....trying to take things one step at a time......i got season 2 of the wire (hbo's critically acclaimed series...whose 4th season just ended)......d and i decided to start watching the entire thing from teh beginning since i only hopped on board in season 3 and she in season 4.....so needless to say i'm looking forward to watching those......

anywyas...yet again...i'm at that point where i must end this.....stil have more to write, but it's just after midnite...and i have a long day ahead....

I'll be back....(sooner than u think)...

*names changed to protect the innocent

Been too long...

2007-02-16T21:23:00.000-08:00

...let me be honest with you guys....I haven't posted in a while, because alot has been going on.......some good..some not so good.....alot of external stuff...alot of internal stuff...

I've noticed that when times get a little challenging I draw back on the blogging...almost like I don't want to share my really low points with you.....well....i'm going to tonite....

I know this blog was intended to chronicle my journey from doctor to full time musician, but alot of other shit happens in between....

1st up.....do't know if you remember, but we moved over the xmas holidays/new years.....I love the place, but the commute is getting to me.....to get to work for 8..i have to leave here by 6:30...which means i have to get up by 5:45/6......also on the nights i work till 8...i don't end up getting home till after 9...........
What has been happening lately is that i've been reaching home late....dead tired from all the driving....no energy or vibes to do any music...waking up late rushing off to work....getting home late.....u get the picture.....

Last week or daughter was ill....had to rush her to the hospital.....she wasn't admitted..she's fine now, but we had quite a scare......and it broought to the surface a few issues D and I had to deal with....everything's good now though.....

Also....ms marshmellow blackbird....a talented DJ/Producer/Vocalist who was in melbourne with me at teh redbull academy is in Jamaica visiting her family...she stayed with us last week...and because of my hectic schedule (and low vibes) we didn't get to work on as musch music as i'd have hoped we would...she's coming back to our spot this weekend again though...I'm planning to finish the track we started in australia so we can start working on some other stuff......

On a non-musical note....i ran my 1st 5K last weekend.....was a beautiful run.....did it in about 32:40.....a personal best......(all you runners reading this...don't laugh)....
Was a cool crisp sunday morning...i had the iPod with me....had some JDAvey, Georgia Ann Muldrow, Bongo Maffin, MAdlib, Dilla, Deadbeat in the headphones...all the songs were at roughly the same BPM (beats per minute)..and in time with my pace....so it almost felt like i was meditating.....i was zoned out man......was a beautiful feeling....there's another one next weekend...i'm thinking about doing it too.....

Musically......i met with a lawyer last week to discuss some business....he seems perfect, but his fees are out my league right now......he's friends with a good friend so he says we can work something out, but i'm a bit embarrased to tell him that unless he's working for free...i can't afford him for another month or so.......
THe kind of relationship i want to have with him is one where i can come to him with a plan....and he advises/assists me in getting thru the red tape and making it happen

....hey listen folks....i'm sorry, but i have to log off now...its mins to 1am....i still have these vocals to finish editting.......
I know this isn't the best 'come back' blog, but it'll have to do.......
There's alot more on my mind i need to type out, but not now.....

...nex time....

be god (that was a typo...but i like how it sounds..so i'll leave it....be god y'all)

I think I'm growing up..or in love...or something

2007-01-28T20:46:00.000-08:00

..today i had a few hours at home to myself...I hadn't worked on any music for a couple days now....was really tired...
..so what did I do??........lie down in the living room, put the iPod on shuffle...and zone out to some music..??...nope.....lock myself in the studio and work on some music.??...nope....Go jogging in preparation for the 5K i'm running in 2 weeks (another post)...?? nope..

I spent all the time tidying the house.....that's not why i think i'm growing up....its that i was actually enjoying doing it.....and no the act of cleaning dind't bring me joy...(please dont get the wrong idea....i do my share of cleaning up around here)....but today...i was doing it....not because i couldn't stand walking around a messy house.....simply because the girls were out and I wanted them to come home to a clean place....

i dunnno.....mightn't seem like anything...but it is to me...

Yeah....on to other things......D and I just finished watching episode 6 of Season 1 of The Wire....got the DVD set the other day.....
Last night.....i played out for the 2nd time in my life....1st time was back in melbourne.....went to this lounge spot in new kingston....played a few tracks....
Had to use my sis' computer cause this one isn't used to the live performance thing..ie too slow...
I had a few glitches, but overall i think it went well for a 2nd performance....met some people who liked what they heard and want to do some work....they're not musicians themselves, but into things i want to eventually get into.....so as soon as things firm up I'll let u know....

The car accident is going thru the insurance company now.....boy says he can't afford the estimate i gave him.....

This week.....going to be hectic at work.....job2 at least....one of the other doctors will be on leave for a week and a half...so i'll be working till 8 monday to thursday then monday to wednesday next week....

TO do list:
-call lawyer
-send finished vocal track to producer in montreal
-deliver dvd with .wav files for tracks to poets
-sleep better
-jog 2 miles at least 3 times this week
-buy mix cds and fedex them to EW in london
-burn CD with a dozen beats and send to AS in trinidad
-pick up case of redbull
-pick up BLS CME credits from heart association
-re-register with medical council

have a good week people

Car crash..bottle mash..gyal show flop...

2007-01-18T17:46:00.000-08:00

..don't know why that 'ol' dancehall tune has been in my mind all day....
maybe because i was in little car crash last night....
I'm still smiling....fortunately nobody got hurt.....
ok...close your eyes and imagine this.......
you get up yesterday morning at like 3:30am....spend an hour reflecting/planning/dreaming/scheming/visulaizing......spend the next hour and a half working on a track for a producer whose work you really love.....you have a bowl of raisin bran without milk...a banana...glass of soy milk....2 capsules of some 'energy formula' that has ginseng, gotu kola, some other shit....u take a hot shower...get dressed...kiss your partner and daughter goodbye....drive from your new apartment.....it's a crisp cool kingston morning...you've left home at 6:45am...early enuff to beat the traffic...get to work an hour early.....sit in the car listening to some good music..take a 30min nap....go to work....have a cool day at the job......tthen u leave...headed to job 2 which was supposed to be from 3-8pm......at 5pm the other doctor comes and says he was slated to work from 5-8...so u can go home early.....u decide to stay and not see any patients but finish up some work on the track you started on the laptop......
U leave at 8pm head to the hospital to check a friend and pick up something.....leave hosptial at 8:30...pull outside the gate and hear a voice.."ahhhh.....the traffic is heavy..just turn on the ipod, roll up the window and take your time and go home...
you're driving down a road you normally FLY down...this nite for some reason you're driving at 30mph......U see a car pulling out....u're in the left lane (we drive in the left here in ja).....nothing is coming down beside you in the right lane...so you're assuming the car coming out is going to hold the right lane......all of a sudden you notice the fool isn't stopping....
u slam on the brakes....then bam......he up in the front of the car......
All people are driving down looking at the scene.....out of the car steps like 6 young men......
one starts acting all tough like i'm at fault....i use a few expletives stare him down.....while thinking to myself...."shut up fool...you have a child at home...don't do anything stupid"......the driver comes up looking scared....i see that....imagine it was me....try to be as cool as i can....say i don't want ot involve the police....

enuff of this man....lol
basically a student ran into me last night...he just got his liscence like 4 days ago....we handle the sitaution like gentlemen....shake hands exchange information....i go to see my mechanic today...get an estimat of 39000JA dollars....go to the police station the guy comes with me..we report the accident....he sees the figure wants me to take MY car to HIS body mechanic in SPANISH TOWN......i'm like fk no......if you can't afford it...deal with the insurance company man......he calls his mother...i speak to her...she's babbling/rambling....

man....i'm saying to myslef.....i couldve gone to the fking car dealership and have them replace ALL the parts damaged and charge this fker at mint.....but noooooooooo I decide to be 'cool' and just get a mechanic to fix what doesn't have to be replaced......and they trying to make me seem unreasonable......lol..shit is so funny man......

yeah so i'm driving a car with a big dent in the front right side.....
coulda been worse.....

yep....

Also got my 1st issue of wax poetics magazine yesterday.....
excellent magazine....i'd been hearing about it for years now, but browsed thru an issue someone had in australia.....subsribed a few weeks back.....excellent publication so far......

it's thursday night.....after9pm now......headed to bed....waking up at 3....going to finish up that track i'm working on with 'producer X' (name will be revealed once its finished and stuff)....going to start another piece i've had in mind for a few days now.....

anyways...b4 i fall asleep over the keys....i'm out folks.....
be good....be safe and......

One down ...51 to go...

2007-01-07T02:33:00.000-08:00

...yeah so what happened this week???

The interview I did for this magazine this past summer after finding out about the red bull thing finally came out this past week...
Its the worst thing i've read in a magazine in years...lol....First up the grammar and spelling make this blog look like a Toni Morrison novel.....And what's worse is that she made some serious grammatical errors when quoting shit she THOUGHT i said.....

I rmemebr she asking me who are some of my influences...i said..J-Dilla has been an idol and love his work...etc.....I mentioned that he passed in february...She rpints that although my friend J-dilla passed....he played a major role in his friend's success....I was like WHAT..!!!????!!

I dunno man...i was fuming initially...but i've let it go.....i'm grateful for the write up though.....she said "this master of the keyboard....." and in the same paragraph quotes me as saying I have a very basic knowledge of the piano....

Anyways....
Last night had an interview on the radio.....was trying to text all the jamaican massive telling you all to tune in....but some of them didn't go thru......
It was on Radio Mona...a show called island vbz....the guy who does the show is actually a friend of mine from campus days.....We reconnected a few months ago....
WAs a cool interview......Wasn't as nervous as i was for the one i did in australia....

Yeah....so it's been a busy week......
On other musical notes.....the track i was contributing to someone's ablum (a producer i met in australia)...didn't make the album.....I was actually to contribute to it vocally....yes..i have some skills...lol...was actually a spoken word piece......I sent him a rough draft like 3 weeks ago...he liked it...but with all the moving..i didn't have the time or energy to complete it...
He still wants me to finish it they'll put it out on a 12-inch with a single from the album......
I was initially a bit dissappointed....but it's probably for the best......i wouldn't have wanted to hand him something i wasn't happy with........

Marshmello blackbird ...one of the particpants who was with me in melbourne is here in ja until february......she's going to spend a few night by us.....want to take her around and introduce her to some people....hopefully we can make some music while here too....

yeah....so i think i'm off to pretty good start this year.....also had a few 'chance' meetings this week...literally ran into a veteran producer i've been meaning to meet up with in the bank on friday....we'd spoken on the phone a few times in december but he was always in the middle of something...said he was working on a project...i decided to wait until january to call him back....I turn around from the teller i was with..walk off and nearly knock him over....I introduce myself....we shake...he says....Call me man...we need to talk...i don't know if i was imagining it..he said it with a sense of urgency.......
meant to call him today, but didn't.....don't like calling people about business on a sunday...so i'll call monday at lunch time.....

yeah...so its sunday morning....mins to 6 in the am.....i'm about to go for a brisk morning walk....then go to the old house and clear some more stuff....then...come back have b/fast....and take the little one out for a picnic and give mommy a couple hours to herself....

have a good week people..

out

Its 4am.....

2007-01-03T01:02:00.000-08:00

...and i've been up for about an hour now....
I like the way the year is starting...although i haven't done much since jan 1.....lol...i feel productive....

I was just thinking that one of the big changes i need to make for 07 is to stop considering myself the 'under dog'....lemme clarify...

What has kept me sane over the last 2 or so years is that i was working with some low budget, lo-fi equipment....and yet was still making decent quality music....Personally i think my music is great, but i wouldn't dare start c omparing myself to others whose work i admire and respect....i just think for me...from where i'm coming from..the stuff i own..the other responsibilites i have....i'm doing pretty good...

So everytime i felt hopeless and that my shit was weak...i'd stop and say to myself...."listen man...you're making music on your living room table...with headphones cause u don't want to wake your girlfriend and daughter...you're up at 3am because you have to start getting ready for work at 6"....
In a way....that has helped me....that 'making something out of nothing' situation...even though i know they're people out there making good shit on less..

But that way of thinking has gotten stale for me......i'm tired of using that as a crutch, for want of a better word.....

I was such an idealist....i told myself...that i wouldn't buy any new software unitl i started making money from music..i'd use my 1st cheque to upgrade my set up....there were things i wanted...but i'd hold back until 'that day' came....
The other day i was like...fk that man....
I got a bonus from work this month.......instead of putting that bonus aside...pretending it wasn't there....i added it to our regular income....and used the same system we do every month (10% to the investment account----basically an account that we use for things that will bring in additional income...in our case music, art, real estate; 10% tithe; 10% emergency fund-----in case anything unplanned pops up...this one often accumulates; 10% treat money----we use this to spend on ANYTHING we want for ourselves; 60% living expenses--gas, rent, bills, food etc)....
So last month end....all the figures increased......
I went and bought the latest version of Ableton Live.... Also planning to order a mic this month as well.....
While my setup is still 'lo-fi'....its a big upgrade for me.....and since getting the new program i'm slowly shedding that 'underdog' mentality....I mean its always good to make the most of what u have....but after a while u have to upgrade.....makes no sense intentionally staying at teh same level...

Now i'm not saying that by simply buying a new program and getting a real mic is going to take my music to higher heights.....but the shift in thinking that allowed me to step out and buy those things will.....

.....going to wash my hair and roll my hair now...

out

Out with the old....in with the......

2007-01-01T19:08:00.000-08:00

.....u know how that one goes....no need for me to finish it...
NOw...i must warn you....the writer of this blog is extremely tired....he is nodding off as he types....so expect the usual grammatical and spelling mistakes...a word might be left out every now and then.....

Yeah so....2006 is don....(oh by the way....this post is going to be loooong...so buckle up or wait till you're at home with a cozy and warm with a cup of french vanilla coffee to your left...)

Yeah the year is done....over...never to be back again....
Its funny....when i started this blog back in march/april i remember thinking..."...yeah and i'm going to close 2006 out with a wicked, entertaining and inspiring blog".....get all of it out...to make room for what's to come in 07...

Well....it's mins to 11 pm on the night of the 1st...I'm tired as hell...don't know what i'm writing tonite.....
I'm here in the new apartment in the living room...girls asleep...i have Talib Kweli and Madlib's new album Liberation in the headphones.....you can download it here for free

I'd mentioned the track Funny Money a few months back.....yeah....
So things are cool right now....I'm here sitting back doing what most people do on new years day....think about the year just gone...

Dec 30 2005....my birthday...my parents were in JA...we all had dinner at Norma's...I remember saying to myself..."2006 has to be different"...

aorund the same time...i remember chatting with AFKAP we were telling each other about our plans for the year....I remember him sayin.."2006 HAS GOT to be that year"....I took that mantra with me for the next 364 days....

I'd found out about the RBMA a month or 2 prior and thought I'd need to get there.....

January 2006...decided to run the reggae marathon in december 2006....

April 2006...application for the academy comes out....printed the forms....took over a monthto fill it out and put together a cd with beats to send them......googled a picture of melbourne (yarra river) put it as my desktop pic ...so every time i sat down to use the computer to make music from then i'd see a pic of melbourne (where the academy was to be held).....

April 2006...stepped up the running program...started juicing 5-6 carrots, 1 apple, 1 orange for b/fast....drinking lots of water....eating well...runnnin 2wice during the week.....having a long run on saturdays....

June 15, 2006.....our daughter turns 1...started walking a week before

Friday July 21, 2006....Found out i got thru for the redbull music academy....

LAst weekend of july/1st weekend of august 2006....Worked on the medical team for a music festival in JA...(the fks haven't paid us yet!!!!!....anyways...another post)...Handed out a few copies of a cd i had spent the last 2 months working on....was a powerful learning experience....learnt so much about marketing/promoting ones music....realized who hard 'selling your self' can be....

October 2006...Arrived in melbourne australia for what would be a life changing 2 weeks....a 2 week period where i'd meet some beautiful people.....get put on to some mind blowing music....learn alot of new stuff.....

Novemeber 2006...Arrive back in JA and crash.....came down hard from the high of the academy.....the joys of this wonderful job i work at was the culprit.....

Nov 2006....realize that the apartment we were at was getting too small......started worrying about money...started 2nd guessing myself big time....
one day after a really low point...realize what i was doing wrong...remembered how blessed i am.....
Started feeling better....
Last sunday in november we get a call from my sis..who tells us about an apartment thatr sounds good....we go check it out...i don't like it...we decide to check another one..fall in love with it...it's in the hills above kingston...feels like i'm in Portland..cool, green, cozy.....nuff space for the little one to run around....

Dec. 2, 2006....Upset with myself for allowing my training to slip from septemebr 2006 and cause me to miss the reggae marathon..

December 2006...at peace with my job...i don't like it, but i'm grateful for it......Chose to no longer dwell on how bad, boring, draining the work is....

Decemeber 30, 2006...Turn 31....eating dinner with my parents, my sis, my better half, a family friend and an 18 month girl...

JAnuary 1, 2007...i'm typing this.....

That's my poor attempt at a year in review.....

2006 has been one of the best years of my life....no question.......i've been thru so much...inside and out....met so many people...seen a few big dreams come true..seen some even bigger ones come closer.......cried, laughed, was scared stiff, liberated, nervous, confident, fit, out of shape
couldn't have done it without D (my other/better half), my daughter, sis, parents, friends (new and old), afkap, andreya triana , the internet, myspace, some giving, brilliant, music loving germans, club/room 101, deadbeat, Krust, Spacek, Bryan Phillips, Skream, Aroop, Rachel Perry, Marshmellow blackbird, Tahnee, a tall blonde woman from new Zealand, 1st floor resident DJ Ms. Butt,...all the people i know who've encouraged me....those who've tried to "talk sense into me"...

I spent the last few days thinking about where i want to go in 07...and more importantlyy WHY i want to go there.....All the intentions seem good...lol..so i think once i follow the plan....this year should be alot better than last year...and this blog should be a little more entertaining.......
I must admit...that when i think about some of the plans i have..i get nervous....i don't know up to this point how exactly...i'm going to do them....but like 06 has taught me......just put in the work..then sit back and watch the universe you show the way.....

THink i'm closing off now.......if you've made it this far into the post....thank you..for putting up with the rambling.......
I wish u all the same blessings, good fortune, health, strength, joy, goose bumps, love, new people in your life, loss of bad habits, peace of mind that's coming my way in the coming months...

Please don't forget that the real and only battle is between your ears....your thoughts....if u lose the battle for control of your thoughts you won't move forward......please....take a few minutes a day to sit with yourself and dream...
please....give thanx for 5 things in your life EVERY morning this year...please.....share your stories of success and so called failures with others....
please....sleep more (don't be up at minutes to midnite writing blogs).....eat better.....exercise more....smile more.....call him/her more often....forgive more....drink alcohol less, smoke less often...listen to more music....please say "No" more often.....breathe deeper.....

g'nite/morning folks....

Still here

2006-12-18T20:29:00.000-08:00

It's less than a week before christmas and we're still in the 'old' apartment....
Place doesn't seem empty enough.....I"m beginning to wonder if we'll be able to move out by christmas...I mean we do have till Jan 15 to leave this place, but I wanted to be over at the new spot before that 4 day holiday weekend....We'll see....

As I sit here laptop on this crowded dining table turned computer station/mini mini studio....Its slowly hitting me that I won't be making beats at this spot for a while...(i'm secretly plotting to buy this entire house...don't know when...don't know how....but i want it)...
One of the pluses about the new place is that there's another room we're going to convert int o a workshop/studio....Half of the room will be D's...to do her painting etc....other half will be mine to make music....i'm going to convert the closet into a vocal booth...somehow.....get the AC unit we have here set up over there....

Musically......i'm polishing up some tracks....some are old....others are fairly new.......Putting together a CD to give to a bredren I was on campus with who wants to interview on his radio show on january 6....
I think I mentioned this earlier, but a producer I met recently asked me to contribute to a track on his upcoming album...i'm working on that now too......wanted to have it done before I left this apartment...we'll see....

I want to put up a year in review blog....u guessed it...before the year is up....
Going to take u on a journey from dec 31 05...to dec 31 06.....alot has happened...alot of 1sts...a few lasts......nuff joy, a little pain...good music...

Don't really have much more to write tonite.....i know i know...some of you are saying..."his blogs are getting boring man"......that may be true, but I'm just not settled enough right now to write anything logical..my mind's all over the place..

so on that note....

....

Movin on up.....

2006-12-10T20:58:00.000-08:00

..yes yes y'all.....me and the fam are in the middle of moving right now...
We're headed to a cozy little 2 b/r place in the hills above kingston.....
Rent is cheaper....landlady seems cool...neighbour seems cool....nuff yard space for the little one to run around in....

I hate moving....i've moved a few times in my life...from jamaica to antigua when i was 7....from one house in antigua to another when i was 10...from that house to the house my parents built when i was 15....from antigua back to jamaica to study....while in JA i switched rooms every year for the 6 years i was there.....moved from campus to a flat off campus at 24/25....in 2003 moved from that flat to where we are now....and its time to move on again....

I'm going to miss this place.....I fell in love in here....we conceived our 1st born here....I had my 1st firecracker here (you have to google that one)...made some beautiful music here....alot of memories man.....PArt of me doesn't want to leave.....i guess i'm just comfortable with the past.....and i'm nervous about the future....

i guess its another life lesson...i hate that term by the way...life lesson....sounds like something one of those life coaches woudl use and personally.....naw..that's another post....

It's sunday night..actually monday morning...just after midnite....getting ready the week mentally....

I'm tired now man...falling asleep as i type....

Siging off now...
Tomorrow...joggin..wash the car...work....move some stuff....make some call/send some emails....go to bed...

Tonite...

2006-12-07T18:14:00.000-08:00

...i'm resetting myself....I'm going to llisten to new new CDs i bought today...Jay-Z----Kingdon Come...and Flying Lotus---1983....Lotus was actually a participant at the academy this year too...he was there 1st term though...check him out here...

Yeah....going to bed 'early' 11pm....getting up at 4:30...take about 30-45mins quiet time....go joggin...(i'm so scared to hit the road again...i'm sooo out of shape...yes Top....i said it!!!!..lol)
Get back in just before the little one wakes up......
Let her come out and say "dada..dada??..dada...dada??" lift her up....change her...go wake up D...talk for a bit...go eat a banana and some raisin bran.....drink some water.....go brush my teeth...go shower....get dressed...brush up the shoes....rush D and tell her..."c'mon man...i'm late."..knowing damn well she's not holding me up a bit....grab the little one take down to the car...strap her in....open the door for D......plug in the iPod...put on some Georgia Ann Muldrow

Drive to the gas station on the way to work....buy a couple packs of honey roasted nuts....a bottle of water....get to work..kiss D..kiss the little one....remind D that i'll finish about 1:30-2pm....
go to work...NOT get miserable while at work......

I'm going to have a good day tomorrow....
peace...

me

The Week (and a half) in review

2006-12-05T16:35:00.000-08:00

....i wanted to write about last weeks happenings, but procrastination, fatigue, and a hectic schedule got in the way...
Okay...so to put things in the proper perspective....we're talking about the week (and a half) of November 26...

Sunday morning.....get a phone call from my sis...telling us.."hey..just checked out the classifieds...some nice sounding apts in there...check this one out at.....)
Now D and I have been 'looking' for a place for a while now....y'kno the kind of look but not looking kinda thing....i mean the apartment we in now is cool...i love the wooden floors and high ceiling....but it's getting too small...it's ideal for 1 person...close for 2...but 2 with 18monther.....nope....

So we called the number went up to stony hill to see the place....
it was cool...but something about it didn't feel right for me...we sat with the landlord...who seemed really cool...D loved it....i was hesitant....we said we'll think about it and call him back....he apparently liked us and "really wanted us to rent it".....cause there were people callig him non-stop.....

We drove down the road...stopped at a gas station and tried talking about it...D was getting annoyed cause she liked it and i wasn't saying what i didn't like about it.....

She then says...."hey there's another place up in stony hill" lets call and go check that out.....
We get there...as soon as we walk in I tell D.."call the landlady tell her we're taking it"...and that we did

Not only is it bigger and has more storage space than the current apt...its CHEAPER.....Its a 2 b/r cottage up in stony hill....on a huge property.....with nuff nuff nuff banana, breadfruit, pimento sour sop, orange trees...all kinds of stuff....It honestly doesn't feel like we're in kingston...which is something we were looking for.....it's perfect...Only thing is the traffic for me goin to work..i'd have to leave home maybe 2 hours earlier (i leave home at 8:45 on average..to get to a job that starts at "8-8:30"...but that's another post)...

So we got the place.....everybodys happy...

Later that night I went to Live on stage....a show put on by the original don dada in this blogs link section......i had a blast man....some wicked musicians did their thing that night.......i really left inspired.....
They played some of my beats/tracks/songs/instrumentals (i'm struggling with naming my music these days...but that too is another post).....felt really weird hearing them being played and seeing people nodding, walking outside with cell phones on their ears, laughing with friends, sleeping to them......
I was there talking to a friend and a friend of hers (who i had a weird dream about the other night....no no no..not THAT kind of dream...but that too is....u guessed it...another post)......while i was there with them...while talking i was there listening and sayin to myself..."oh shit...i gave him the version without the reverb on the keys....and oh no...the snares on that were compressed too much....All said and done though.....i;m soooooo grateful for that buss though.....
A young lady actually came to me after and asked me if they were for sale....she just wanted to listen to them......
I was like naw.....but i can hook u up with some...i took her contact info..went home and put together a cd of ruff mixed stuff for her......met up with her on wednesday and gave them to her.....yet to hear back from her...need to call her...naw that might make me seem desparate fro feedback...but i am....no i'm not...yes i......
Oh.....and i was introduced to an amazing young vocalist.......a young lady by the name of Natalie Spence......it was nice to finally meet her...been wanting to meet her for months now.....all i can say is remember that name folks.......NATALIE SPENCE...big tings in store...

Yeah......what else that week....OH.....i can't give away the details yet, but i was asked to contribute to a track on a producer's album...i met the guy recently...if i tell u where and how it might give it away...so i'll keep u posted....
I've been trying to work on my part, but just haven't been able to settle down man....Work is really tiring me out now....and its not the hours...its my dissatisfaction with the job......but again..that's another post......
bwoy...i really have alot of "other posts" to put up.....

Yeah......there're a few other things i wanted to touch on...but i can't remmeber them now...i'm at work now (evening job)......and they're about to lock up the place...so i'm out.....

be good y'all...

I'll be posting more red bull pics soon too...

These are those good times......

2006-12-01T17:16:00.000-08:00

..a few from the night i played out...

Monica from Mexico.....was the 1st to join me on stage...

....Sam from Canada up nexx

Nina from Russia with love

I may look all cool here, but I was on the verge of tears at this moment....a stage filled with talented women grooving to MY music......heaven...Nire from NYC in the black hoody....Marsha from bristol on the mic...Zeynep from Istanbul on the right..

A few pics from the academy....

2006-12-01T16:44:00.000-08:00

Yeah..i know i initially wanted this blog to be anonymous, but i'm exposing myself now....lol...going to show some pics from the academy....I'll be back with a few more tomorrow...

Spacek showing us the ways of the MPC....this was actually my 1st time seeing an MPC in real life....(that sounds like something a 10 year old would say..doesn't it??)

...On a warm day we had lunch on the roof...truss me...the vibe was as good as it looks in that pic..

Late night session on Ableton live...notice how tired everybody looks...

MArco Passerani gets deeper into Ableton with us...

I just got a glimpse of how great I am..and will be...

2006-11-30T01:36:00.000-08:00

.....and for the 1st time...it didn't scare me or make me nervous..

(i need to copyright that line....if i ever hear a song/see a poem/read a book with that line...i'm coming for you..lol...i'm serious)

You know....it's really great being alive

2006-11-23T18:09:00.000-08:00

I say this at the end of day....when i felt like giving up...not suicidal kinda giving up, but going back to a 9-5 giving up.....i haven't quit my job...it's just that my focus has been leaving this job...and this week i felt like i wasn't moving...
I was worrying about money...we're not starving...we're fortunate enough to put up some $$ every month...not in debt.....but we need to move...place is getting small with baby and all and i need a room to do my music....the corner of the living room/bedroom-when-the-girls-are-gone thing has its limitations....and bigger place=more rent=more money......
I was worrying about this shy streak in me that i feel is holding me back.....

But this evening i remembered.....the hows aren't important...the whats are. By that i mean...the 1st and most important step is figuring out WHAT it is we want....focussing on that..right down to the smell/feel of it.....then using all the oppurtunities we've been given....After that people/'coincidences'/oppurtunities start popping up then the hows start revealing themselves....

Being honest with myself...recently..i was worryin about the hows...i'd forgotten my whats.....i was just focussing on the fact that i hate my job...this apartment is getting to small etc....i was focussing on what i DIDNOT want......and u know the saying...where attention goes...energy flows...then results show.......so what i've been experiencing this week is a result of what i DO NOT want......
I dug up my journal/dreambook.....looked at some of the dreams that came thru this year....like going to australia....looked at some of the dreams yet to manifest....and i smiled...felt light...felt happy...felt hopeful......

Then it hit me how fortunate i am to be alive....to be able to change my mind..shift my focus and come again...it's like we constantly have the oppurtunity to be born again......If i'm sounding all weird to you..forgive me....

Right now....i'm just glad to be alive....i'm listening to D and her friend N visiting from Florida out in the kitchen...i'm on the computer listening to hear if our daughter wakes up...a cool breeze is blowing thru the window...my belly is full....i have 2 new cds to go listen to (N read my profile on the redbull music academy site and saw i liked zero 7 and brought their 1st 2 albums for me....yes she's a sweetie....out of all of d's friends..she's my favourite..hands down..so cool..anyways..that's another post).......

Right now i'm good.....it mightn't always be this way, but when things get 'bad'...i can always switch up....

I think i've gotten my swagger back y'all

i'm out
be good....

and thanx for reading this...

peace

...a shy guy....

2006-11-20T16:08:00.000-08:00

...o lawd have mercy mercy mercy the man dem......
remember that ol Diana King song.....ahhh...brings back memories...when was that...early to mid 90s??....anyways...

yeah...so i'm here...monday evening sitting down at my usual spot..it's 7pm....d is inside putting our little one to sleep.....I'm here listening to a CD given to me by one of the particpants of the academy this year...a bredren by the name of Vijay...calls himself sleepwalker....the cd is his band Phorous....some really nice "mood music" as he puts it....he told me it's "best listened to at the start or end of the day"...he's so right...really nice and mellow....

yeah...so what am i going to talk about this evening....should i talk about the Sean Paul party i went to weekend b4 last...??.....or maybe the party i went to on saturday.....Now any of you who know me well....are probably saying..."2 parties in 2 weeks?...what has gotten into him??"

in days gone by i would have gone to 2 parties in 3 years...lol...i'm serious....
The sean paul one was a strictly invitation only thing...how'd i get invited i hear you asking....well i got it like that....sean heard some beats loved them and wants me to produce his next album.......
ok...ok...maybe that's twisting the truth a bit....actually it's twisting it alot....lol
i don't know mr. paul..never met him...he MAY have heard my music (i'll tell u that story another time), and no he doesn't want me to produce his next album...
Actually the brand manager from redbull got an invite and he was going to be out the island at teh time so he gave me his invitation.....I was impersonating him that night...
My neighbour who works in the media here got an invite...so we rolled together....
It was cool.....as i walked in though I saw people loooking at me alot....For a minute I thought it was my striking good looks, but then i realized...people were probably wondering ...who the fk is this guy.???...Now jamaica is pretty small and that social/music scene is pretty small.....i saw everybody huggin and kissing each other.....so i was a new face to alot of people i guess....
One thing my neigbour and I were commneting on was the need for people to wear sunglasses at night....I obviously missed the memo man..cause it is NOT COOL..to me at least....there was one guy who was tripping over some cables on the grass....i nearly died laughing......

don't know if u picked it up, but i'm in a prety good mood tonite.......

yeah...back to the party....i met a few people.....had some laughs......stood next to bounty Killer....elephant man spoke to me....does "excuse me boss" count as he was walking by.....

Seriously though.....by nature i'm extremely shy...almost to the point where sometimes i wonder if i have some kind of social anxiety disorder.....Going to these parties and meeting people etc is so unnatural to me....but i'm realizing that i need to step out myself more and more....after all that's what growth is about isn't it.....
And i'm also realizing that networking is a big part of this music thing.....now don't get me wrong...i'm not saying i'm going to be up at every cllub every weekend, but I'll definitely be stepping out alot more....

yeah.....i stepped away from the computer for a few minutes, and i've lost the essence of where i was going in teh previous paragraph....

Ok...so tonite i'm goin to call a few people....some local musicians...just to touch base......

On yet another note....i opened my email inbox this morning and got an email from Steve Spacek....now i don't care if i sound like a groupie, but i was freaking the fk out.....he was basically replying to an email i sent him last week.....it mightn't sound like a big deal, but it is to me...you see up to a year ago i'd never heard any of his music...i'd heard the name...seen the name on internet message boards....when i stumbled on the redbull music academy..his lecture was the 1st i'd downloaded....immediately he sounded familiar...and after listening to him..i knew exactly what his music would sound like...i went out and bought Curvatia and Space Shift and loved them...had them playing for months.....
Then less than one year later to be sitting down having dinner with him..getting advice etc...and getting emailing him back and forth....it still seems a bit surreal...

Y'know...this is one of them blogs i hate....one of those u start and it ends up going all over the place.....my mind is kinda all over the place tonite.....

I'll be back tomorroww...
when i'm alot more stable....

be good people

What the hell happened??

2006-11-18T00:37:00.000-08:00

...now anyone who's been reading this blog over the past few months would swear that since having been back in JAmaica i'd be inspired, churning out some wicked music...enjoying life..feeling on top of the world etc.....Well I haven't and that's part of the reason I haven't been posting much of late...

It's been hard settling back in to my former life....it's not D or the little one...i missed them like crazy and glad to be back around them...they're actually what's keeping me sane....The biggest challenge has been going to work everyday...
Having been thru what I call a life changing experience...seeing the potential in music and in MY music...meeting so many people doing big things with theirs..it's hard to wake up 5 mornings a week and head off to an old run down clinic with someone on leave for 2 months...all their load is now on you..the patients outside your door cussing about how long you're taking.....i mean being back at work is like i'm in a totally different universe man..lol.....I derive absolutely NO satisfaction from this job...nothing.....all i'm grateful for is the paycheck on the 25th...
At the end of the day I'm so drained mentally..all i've been having the energy to do is sleep....haven't been joggin, haven't made any new music....

Until this week that is......My energy is picking up again....got a few emails this week from people telling me how happy they are for me...how proud they are...how they've been living "vicariously" through these blogs (thanx ms. chi)...SO i'm feeling better....
Don't know if I'd mentioned this in a previous blog, but one of the major mental shifts i've made is that i now see myself as an artist....someone creative...not just a doctor who likes music and makes some beats every now and then....I'm creativee.....i have to keep creating....making music is food to me now....i have to make music....not everything is goign to be fresh and wicked..it's more about getting it out now..

So what's the plan i hear some of you asking....I still don't want to release all the details, but it's basically a 5 fold plan for '07:
1. Performing live.....I'm getting this program called Ableton Live next month...eveyrbody i met over so was using it for their live sets...it's really easy to use, but the possibilities are almost endless...there're so many things you can do with that thing...so i'm jumping on that wagon..

2. Getting an 'album' together....now by an album i mean a cohesive set of material music by me..with some surprise guests I've met recently....

3. Get some music on TV...not just jamaican tv, but overseas....the $$ from this will go into getting new equipment/software...

4. Providing tracks for others....anyone basically whose vibe i feel and who feels mine...definitely doing some work with some other redbull participants..actually working a track now...

5. Forming or becoming part of a little 'community' of like minded (not like sounding) musicians/artists/creative folks....and having regualr 'meetings' to share ideas...listen/view each other's projects....

There're actually a few more things, but i'm not too clear on them yet...and as i've learnt its not wise to talk about plans until you have them (or at least the final product) in your head in vivid detail.....so i'll update yo on those as time goes on..

Anyways it's mins to 4am on saturday morning...I'm slowly getting back into my regular routine...going to work on some music and go joggin about 5:30/6.....

be good y'all...

and oh yeah......we're back mutha$@#@as!!!!...haha

I'm officially back now...

2006-11-05T21:06:00.000-08:00

Watched the Wire tonite...1st time in 3 weeks...washed my hair tonite...on the computer minutes to midnight when i planned to get up at 4am tomorrow morning...kitchen has a few dishes in the sink, D and the lil one are fast asleep, I have some beat playing in my headphones......aaaaaahhhhhh...I'm back home now...
THis is my regular sunday night ritual......

I'm officially out of the twilight zone now....Melbounre is fading....the memory of the details like the smell of my room (naw I still remember that), the colour of the bike with the chrome rims that one of the academy security guards has (naw..it was blue...i still remember that)....hmmmmm...it's all still pretty fresh in my mind then....

Difference is that I'm beginning to sink back into my 'normal' life...yet at the same time I feel like somethings just around the corner....Things are different....same car, same clothes, same job, same love for eating peanut butter straight out the jar......but something is different....I see myself differently...I'm no longer a doctor who does music on the side...it's the other way around....and i'm not ashamed to say that anymore.....I'm more confident in my abilites, more hopeful of the future...more optimistic, i know about 40 people I didn't know a month ago...and they all love music as much as i do.....i'm going to see about half of them again....i'm going to work with about a quarter of them at some point.....

2006 has indeed been THE year (so far).....
One plan for 2007 that i can let out the bag is an album....By mid-late 2007 I should have an album worth of material ready.....

Anyways....it's 12:08am Monday morning.....i have a pretty long week ahead of me...

be good

Jet lag is a mother@#@&$r

2006-11-01T12:21:00.000-08:00

I got in yesterday......
and am soooooooooooooo fkin tired man....

When i reached I felt fine...and that's what it does....once you're moving everything is good...the minute you sit down and get still...u feel like u got hit by a boulder.....

i don't know how i'm going to make it to work tomorrow...

anyways people...
i'm good....the girls are good....
I'm still inspired...

Melbourne...Please forgive me.....

2006-10-28T22:46:00.000-07:00

This was posted on Sunday afternoon....don't know why it never went up on the website...
ah well

I posted a few days back that I hated this city...and wouldn't want to live here....
In true bougie tourist style I was making that judgement having only been in the central business district and to the academy......

YEsterday Rachel....half of the team that took all the pics you see on www.redbullmusicacademy.com .....took me Marsha and Bubbz to Fitzroy...that's where she lives......We alked up and down Brunswick Street....
Picture a street about 2 miles long...straight...cafes all along both sides....people walking up and down....resturants with sweet smelling food....thrift shops...indie record stores....clothing stores....clubs and bars.....people skating on skateboards...folks dressed in afrikan clothes (yes a saw a few white folks in dashikis)....goth looking folks....Armani wearing middle aged people...people of asian, afrikan, european descent......
It's the total opposite of where we're staying.......
YEsterday we went to this craft market..i bought some earrins/bracelets for D and my sis.....We all went to for dinner after that....met up with two of Rachel's (photographers) friends...they were both very drunk/loud..and annoying at times...but it was cool.....I had met one last week at the ESPY where Benji B and Steve SPacek played.......SHe brought me a little homegrown present....
I had been turning down offers since I got here, but decided what the hell....I've only got a few days left....so i accepted....lol

THe remaining participants hit the town last night, but I decided to stay in and 'chill'...lolplus I was really tired......

Got up this mmornin and decided to head back out to fitzroy to soak up the vibe alone this time......took the tram over.....maybe it was the homegrown gift in my head or the unreleased music from my fav new artist someone from the academy gave me (he made me swear not to tell anyone about it....more on this later) in my headphones
...or maybe the cool (needed a jacket button up) sunny day...but it felt great....I wasn't planning on spending any more money, but saw some jewlery i knew D would like....and I bought some CDs....(DJ Shadow...entroducing, an Augustus Pablo CD and a CD by a new Zealand dub group..Salmonella Dub)....
I ran into 3 other participants...(germany, germany and italy)...walked around with them for a bit...then broke off on my own again.....

So i just got back to the hotel...I'm going up to start packing...wash my last set of clothes......and chill for the rest of the day...Pau from barcelona is still here...so i may go check him later......There's a haloween party at HOnky tonks (bar/club about 5 mins walk from here) tonite...everbody says they're going....I may pass thru....dressed as a doctor (I'll throw on my scrubs and a shower cap).....

A shuttle is coming for me at 8:45 tomorrow mornin...then I fly out at 12:20...15 hours to LA...a 3 hour wait then 5 hours to miami...then overnight...then a 1:15 trip to kingston....I should reach home tuesday morning....

YEah....so this is probably my last blog from australia.....2 weeks ago I was sitting down at teh acadmey getting an introductory lecture.....
I haven't cried...thought i would...maybe i will when i'm descending into JA.....i dunno man.....

Again....it's been beautiful....life changing to say the least....and this is just the beginning.....I've been giving so much I feel it's my duty to give back now......not duty as in 'i think i should cause it's only right', but in a ...'i want to give' kinda way.....
This trip has taught me how powerful giving is......I don't want to get too personal on here but.......naw lemme stop....

I'm toying with the idea of cutting my hair....to mark this transition point....or a tattoo....i dunno....tatoos aren't really my style...but who knows......

I"m in a good place now.....lol....i'm rambling.....I just wish I could show you all how good i feel at this moment in time........

Life is/will be good

g'day maite!!!!!

All good things.......

2006-10-27T03:21:00.000-07:00

....must come to an end i guess.....only this feels like the beginning...
Mind you..i'm a bit tipsy right now....i just guzzled a sweet slurpy I thought as all sugar and ice...but turned out to be laced with some strong alcohol....
Today is the last day of the academy.....friday night......We're all in the lounge eating laughing taking pics, xchanging email addresses........Wonderful atmosphere......There're about 3 parties going on tonite........I'll be going where ever the wind blows me.......
I leave on Monday...today was Just Blaze's lecture....was really long.....really cool.....slipped him a cd too......
Benji B of radio 1 fame joined us for dinner and that was cool too...slipped him an email address. CD and got his ontact info....

Like I said in the last blog man....the music i make from here on in is going to be so different I feel funny giving people my 'old' stuff.....

The academy puts together a compilation CD of musc made at the academy......I'm submitting the track I worked on with Bryan Pau and Marsh.......we have till december i hear to sub mit it...so i'm going to play around with marsha's vocals (dub style) and make sure she approves of the final product.......

Man....i can't descirbe the vibe here now....everybody's happy, tired, drunk, inspired, excited........
I keep having to pinch myself......i'm in australia man......with musicians/music lovers from all over the world....i'm eaving in 2 days and feel ssooooooo fking inspired..........it's scary......

One of the highlights of this trip was a conversation I had last night at a a club with a particiapant from last term...her name's andryiana triana (i think i splet it wrong).....she was telling me just how life altering the acadmey has been for her.......I told her about me constantly doubting myself and my talent....and she gently reminded me why we've been put here....to make music.......to make people feel good with music......and just how stupid it is for us to bury that gift and allow society to tell us otherwise......our 5 min conversation felt like 2 hours...simply because I knew exactly where she was coming from.........She's someone I"m definitely goign to be in contact with......a definite inspiration.....and a beautiful spirit...........

Man...i'm good.....just having sensory overload.......

Honestly...if you're reading this....and you make music, love music...or love making music.....apply next year.....it's life altering.......my life won't be the same.......

anyways folks.......
I"m off....going to soak up the vibe of the rbma lounge one last time.....

over and.......

Before and After...

2006-10-25T22:00:00.000-07:00

...I've had a few points in my life i can look back on and say...yeah..things were this way before and after such and such happened things were different....
As i'm sure u can imagine, this red bull thing has been one of those, but its happening in a funny way....

Now this may sound drastic, but right now..i feel like just giving away/throwing away all the music Ive made up till now....
The music i make from here on in is going to be different from what i've made thus far.....My mind has beeen taken on so many different paths over the past 2 weeks.......
IT's not like I'm ashamed of the music i've made thus far......its just not where i'm at now.....I was planning to slip a CD to Just Blaze tomorrow, but i'm 2nd guessing that move man.......It's not me anymore....It's simple, not much thought has gone into it...it's mainly groove based....mostly loops/chops.....no tension...not plot...no story..no emotion......i dunno....maybe i'm being a bit too emotional right now, but i'm in a weird place....

It feels like i'm almost starting over...starting from square 1......and i won't lie...there're moments when that feels scary.......I mean I was supposed to leave medicine by the end of the year......how can I when I'm 'starting over' musically???.....I dunno man.....
I feel good though....i'm grateful.....i'm excited....i'm scared....i'm tired....i'm drained....i'm dreading the 23 hour flight back and the overnighting in Miami Intl....I'm missing the girls....
This is a really weird feeling.....I think if this academy was 3 days longer I'd burst...lol.......

Yeah.....so tomorrow's the last day.....i don't know how i'l feel then....but right now i'm kinda looking 4ward to going home.....I think I've gotten what I needed to get from melbourne........
I've changed musically......i've heard shit for the 1st time that blew me away.....i've 'performed' live for the 1st time....i've een on radio...i've let strangers hear my music...i've met, had dinner withand learnt from a musical hero......i've met musicians from all over the world...a few of whom i know i'll be in contact with and will work with in the future......
It has been great.......

What next????
I have a little plan up my sleeve........but if i tell u now.....it'll kill the suspense and you wont come here so often...haha.....
but seriously....i do have sme ideas/plans/schemes in mind.....and in true 'from riches to...' tradition i can't let them out the bag till they've manifested or at least close....

For certain........i'm going to reach out and make contact with some of you locak musicians reading this blog....(Wayne....i played Alchemy on the radio last night.......they LOVE i man.....asked me if it's been released etc...we'll talk)....

Crashing??

2006-10-25T02:47:00.000-07:00

I'm down in the lounge...came down from the studio....nothing's flowing ......from neither of us......
I dunno man.....seems like everybody's kicking ino creative mode now and the energy upstairs is higgh........too much at times....
It's weird.....just like the melbourne weather..my energy levels go up and down by the hour.....this morning it was freezing cold.....was HOT in the afternoon....now at mins to 8pm it's freezing.......

It's like i'm trying to hold out until friday.........like friday's the finish line......
I find myself nodding off at times.....falling asleep.....it's weird...

anyways....going to go over my playlist for the radio show....i go on in like 20 mins....

I'm out...
me

There's no feeling on earth like........

2006-10-24T21:51:00.000-07:00

.......watching your mind being opened up....not literally...but just feeling like a new door has been opened the fk up...
That happened to me just now......
The lecture by DJ Krust just finished.......I'm speechless man.....
I won't be making music the same again........I can't wait to get home and be in my zone and start creating.....
That was it man.......While typing htis i'm wondering if i'm just all emotional and just typing without thinking, but I don't think so..i really don't think so....

His music hit me man.......and I totally got where he was coming from.......he touched on his recent studying of mysticism and spirituality and how it affects your music.....

It's so weird.....i've never heard his music b4 today, but when i heard it...it sounded so familiar.....kinda like how i felt when i 1st heard Spacek, but on a much deeper level......i dunno man....

I'm going to go eat some lunch and think abou this shit....

Later

Tune in

2006-10-24T19:34:00.000-07:00

I'm going to be live on internet radio tonite (wednesday 25th) at 8:00pm..or maybe 8:15pm MELBOURNE time...(just google to find the difference between here and where u are)....It's an interview kinda thing...and i'll be playing some of my own beats..as well as the music i got from people b4 i left......
It's an hour long show....

l8r

PS....oh..it'll be on www.rbmaradio.com or just go to www.redbullmusicacademy.com and the radio should be playing in the top right corner

Collaboration

2006-10-24T04:26:00.000-07:00

Now tell me.....what are the chances that one of the people I've been mean to work on music with makes the kind of beats i like....and left med school after a year and odd to make music.....Coincidence???.....i don't think so...
I don't know who selected the participants, but they used some kind of personality profile.....Everyone i get to know...i find out at some level we have something in common....it's almost scary......

Nerko.....a bredren from barcelona.....heard his music on myspace b4 we got here and knew we had to work together.....Came here...met...made plans..but nothingcame......today we were talking over lunch and I found out he left med school to focus on music...i was like...naw man...we HAVE to work on shit today...lol...this is too eerie....

So we went up to the stuio..all the rooms were full....so we set up a make shift studio in a corner...got some speakers....hooked up my laptop to his audio interface.....and i was playing some stuff for him....
We got to one track i did a couple months back......i had used a vocal sample from Bilal unreleased album....i felt 'bad' about that beat because bilal's album wasn't released etc....so i had added some stuff around the vocals..some keys...some synths..some congas...and some other stuff...so it sounded decent without bilals vocals, but not complete....
So I played it for Nerko without the voacl sample...he liked it.....added some trumpet samples he had on his laptop.....i got in a zone and pulled marsha (UK) out of a studio..and aasked her to listen and see if she felt it.......she immediately grabbed a mic and laid down some guide vocals....she says once we add our finishing touches and give her a cd with it..she'll write something to it.....
Sounds good though....slow 70 bpm track with a reggae feel..........

I met Black Milk today..he's a lecturer tomorrow.....he's part of the production duo BR Gunna....they're some kids from detroit...many call them the heirs appaarent....they've worked with slum village dilla wajeed.....etc....he was telling me he has some tracks on pharoah monch's album due out in december......was cool talkking to someone who's work you've always admired....

Had an intersteing dinner converstaion just now too.....it was me Nerko, Aroop (Uk born singer living in tokyo) and DJ Krust (UK drum and bass lecturer---he's talking tomorrow too)....we were talking about weed and creativity....krust was sayin he basically stopped smoking for years now...and he's more productive since.....we were talking about the power of the mind..creativity........was really enlightening........

Anywyas......i'm headed back up to the studio to put in some more work b4 i head back to the hotel.....
peace y'all

Oh what a night...

2006-10-22T19:09:00.000-07:00

..Yeah..i've skipped a few days....
Saturday night went to see Steve Spacek and Benji B perform at the ESPY......amaaaaaazing.....
Don't have much time to type now, but last night was my performance...

I had planned to play some music after getting a crash course in using a mixer last week......
It was a reggae/hip hop club...
Got their about an hour early..had sound check...the lady that normally plays there was sooo cool..she got us drinks....ran thru the mixer with me again after i told her that this was my dj-ing debut......

The crowd got a little thick after midnight.......I approached the stage...the other participants were in the place and the¥ moved to the front and started cheering.....
I started off with a lil trbute to Dilla...played a few rare beats to get the place going....then i dropped into some old Bob Marley and the Wailers.....moved to some Mighty Diamonds..then steel pulse...then got into some old dub......
I was feeling good...people were swaying....then i made an announcement inviting any MC, singer, poet..anybbody who wants to come up to do it.....
within a minute monica from mexico came up..and started to sing..crowd got even more amped....then marsha from uk....then nina from siberia.by this time i'd switched the beat to one of my own.....then sam from cananda came up..before i knew it was on stage with 6 women all taking turns singing over my beats.....
Then this girl from australia...not with red bull....asked if she could come up....i put on this dudley perkins instrumental...and she rapped over it....was actually pretty good.......
Man...i can't describe the feeling man.....it was surreal.............

anyways....i'll post some pics once i got home (JA)...they were taking pics at the gig so they might post some on the website.......
Mizzell Brothers lecture starting in a few mins....gotz to run...

l8r

It's all about the people..

2006-10-20T20:09:00.000-07:00

I might've said this in a previous blog, but it hit me yesterday.....i realized the most important thing about this academy....
It's the people.....not the fancy equipment and analogue gear that i can't afford/find...not the "wonderful city of melbourne"(which I dislike STRONGLY...but that's another post)....not about making beats here with people....it's about the PEOPLE......
There're so many people from all over the world right here....so many different backgrounds....so many stories...so many diferent journeys.....
I've made up my mind to concentrate on tryin to get to know as many people as i can while i'm here......

Yeah...highlights of yesterday.......1st lecturer was Joe Battan......legendary Latin/Soul singer...Again his name just vaguely rang a bell, but I recognized his music from hip hop samples......HE gave a really inspiring lecture.....talking about his journey, near death experience, perils of the music business........ almost cried man....

After that was a guy who calls himself Radio Slave (amongst other monikers)...his real name slips me...but again another enlightneing lecturer....he's a DJ/producer.......He played some J dilla insturmentals and pointed out that DIlla was also using some dance and electric stuff in his beats as well....I don't know if its because I'd never heard the instrumentals but I never realized that.....Just once again proves how genre-less dilla's music was......

After dinner I sat at a table with Bubbz (UK participant) and Greg Wilson...this DJ/producer from UK who's ben around from the 60s.....he broke away from dj-ing...got into managing in the early 80s and producing in the 90s and is now dj'ing again....he was talkign to us about how the industry has changed....the whole digital age thing......I was telling him how challenging ti is for me making music in jamaica...and not hearing anything there that sounds like me.....and he gently reminded me just how "fortunate" i am to be in that position......We went on to talk about all kindas of stuff...from the influebce of jamaican music to.....the Beatles........was very inspiring...and gave me alot of hope...and again reminded me that i am being guided....everything is falling into place slowly....

Went out to a club.....after walking for about 30 mins..i get there...show them my redbull pass this woman at the door tells me i have to pay $30...the pass only takes $15 off the original 45 dollar price....i was like what the fk???....we're supposed to get in free.....I suspect the sight of a black man with a big tam on and a thick denim jacket clouded her memory.....my thoughts were confirmed when i spoke to a female participant from turkey who told me she got in free.....ahh boy....u gotta love australia.......I guess the race thing is an issue everywhere...US/UK/South Africa...it's just when i go to those places...i see alot of other people that look like me......there are no black people in melbourne man....i can honestly say since i've been here....i've seen no more than 15 black people...nnot counting folks in the academy.........yeah i haven't been out much, but there arent many of us here...and there's a reason for that i guess......
I wouldn't call myself a big traveller, but the places outside the caribbean i've been (US/UK/France/SOuth Africa).....there were things about that place that woould make me say......"y'know...i could see myself living here for a few years"...but melbourne..???.....hell no........They're video cameras everywhere...from in the taxis to the hotel elevators to the club bathrooms to the stop lights....lemme stop...lemme stop complaing......
Lemme just remember why i'm here....to make new friends, make new music and learn.........

Today..there're no lectures planned..so its all studio time....
I'm going upstairs now to continue organizing my play list for tomorrow....

Cheers mate

1st 2 Beats

2006-10-19T15:45:00.000-07:00

YEah...it's not mins to 9 in the am on friday morning....
1st week's coming to a close....
YEsterday's lectures were ok....they were 2 dance music DJs....Alex Smoke..this young guy from glasgow...who's maade 2 critically acclaimed techno albums in the last 2 years...they were also his 1st 2 albums....I must admit...I'm really not into the techno scene, but definitely plan on getting into it....The other was a veteran DJ by the name of Greg Wilson.......
Just listening to these men talk about their musical journeys was enlighteneing......
Several themes keep popping up...with all the lecturers...the all started simple and used just what they had...they all shared their experience and work with others...they we'ren't hiding shit in fear of it being 'stolen'...and they all were inspired by alot of different music....

I made my 1st 2 beats yesterday.....i found a quiet corner and went to work.....They're pretty rough.....one is a hip hop groove...no sampples.....this lady from aussie TV asked if she could use it for a documentary she's making on the acadmey...they're going to try and get it on MTV europe....so that's pretty exciting...she says in terms of rights...red bull is very serious..and they (redbull) will contact me if it goes on to MTV for publishing rights etc.....

Also Benji B ( of BBC radio 1...deviation) approached me and said he loved the beat they played for me in the listening session...aand that he didn't know one could make music like that with the program i have......He also says he wants a CD "at the end of all of this"....so that's going to be cool.....Benji B is the man who plays shit that blows in the like a year or 2....he definitely has an ear for good music..,..so needless to say i'm a bit excited.....

Today....can't remmeber the lecturers names...but should be good....
I'm good though...
Just styaing open and giving thanx...

talk 2morrow y'all

"You're the coolest black man ever"

2006-10-18T17:05:00.000-07:00

....this is why I love alcohol...
I mean i don't usually drink...may have a smirnoff ice or a glass of wine oevery now and then but its not something i do usually....

THe woman who told me this last night obviously does....
We were at a bar/club last night....3 of my fellow participants were playing their music live.....
While we were leaving the bar at mins to 3am this morning (thursday morning) this white wmoan stands in my way and says...."hey...you're the coolest black man ever"....I"m like huh???...
I was about to ask her...."how many black men do u know fool?"....but i held back and decided to let her show her true colours.....I said..."ok...i've never heard that b4"...
She asks where i'm from...I say Jamaica...her eyes open wide and goes on to ask me..."so what do people do over there"....Again I had to hold back...i was going to say.."actualy we walk around in grass skirts and swing from trees...what else?"...instead i said...."we do what any society does.."

I don't think she knew i was with the acadmey crew...cause we were thick last night....She asks...so what do u do??...I"m like "i'm a doctor"...and look her dead in the eye...the look on her face was priceless.....I could read her mind..her look was like..."oh shit...i'm so stupid".....i couldn't resist...i said to her..."yes we do have doctors over there"...smiling politely of course..
I asled her if she's here for the academy...she says..her boyfriend who was at the end of the bar is one of the drivers....(he's one of the guys who picks us up and drives up back and forth)
She then says...i think i had too much to drink....i'm sorry if i offended u....I smiled and said...no you didn't......lol...inside i'm thinking...."thanx for showing me what u really think about caribbean people"

Yeah...but apart from that yesterday was cool....going backwards....the club was cool....i can't tell when last i danced so much....a sistren from UK..who's another particpant...with jamaican parents..decided to play her mother's old record collection instead of her own music.....so u know..nuff old school reggae....Me and this bredren from UK (of nigerian parentage)...were going wild.......

Earlier..there was a studio tutorial session....this italian DJ/producer...was teaching us how to use Abelton Live...which is a music software program i've benn planning to start getting into from next year...so it was great....after that Steve SPacek and DJ Zinc from the UK gave a tutorial on Logic 7..another music program I'm planning to use when i eventually switch to Mac...(yepp....in another couple years i'll be crossing over)

LEcturers that day were Arthur Verocai.......now I first heard about this man last year....the bredren AFKAP (comb and razor blog in my links section)...sent me an mp3 copy of his album last year...or was it earlier this year.....
I immediately recognized the 1st track Cabolco....because it was sampled by Little BRother for the track We Got Next on their last album.....
So the lecture got to the topic of sampling....and he said (in his POOR english)..that he like Little Brother...they contacted him...asked permission for the sample...and paiid for it.....So he says he basically has no problem with sampling as long as credit i given.....so they played the little brother track....I can't explain how surreal it felt to be sitting 10 feet in front of this musical legend....and hearing thru the speakers one of your favourite songs of 2005...While they were playing the song i was going wild..my neck was about to break off...lol...if u mamage to see the lecture on the site... www.redbullmusicacademy.com look for me....i'm sure they zoomed in on me...lol

BEfore Mr. Verocai was a DJ/producer from canada named dead beat....Id never heard of him, but we met at a club on sunday night...and had dinner a few nights b4..really cool guy...he's also in love with jmaican music...
His talk was really inspiring....basically hearing about a young guy doing what he loves and getting paid for it.....I slipped him a CD yesterday and he emailed mea few hours later saying he loves my shit and "we need to find u a label now"....So we're going to talk over the next couple days/.....about what exactly "finding me a label means".....

I'lll keep u up to date on that one.....

Today.....the lecturers are 2 dance music DJs.....tonite i'm going to start working on my live set for sunday night....
I'm playing at a reggae/hip hop club......also on the bill is Bubbz...a UK MC....
What i'm planning to do is to take them on a musical journey.....my musical jounrey....start with some late 70s early 80s reggae....then go up thru the 80s 90s...playing songs that i remember moving me...then ending with the 'future'...my beatts.....A girl from mexico..monica is gong to sing over 2 of my tracks...i want ot ask marsha...the sistren who played last night to sing over one as well....then I want to close with that Bob Marley Remix..and have Bubbz rap over it and go straight inot his set...
I also plan to throw in some of the jamaican music i brought with me....(transdub, cezar, mario/wayne, royal afrikan soldiers)

Anyways...i'm off to the academy now...it's 10:30...want to get some quiet time to work on some stuff before everybody else arives for 12....

be good people

Day2/3

2006-10-17T15:35:00.000-07:00

Day 2 started with an intro session...where each participant gets up on the couch and talks about themselves and answers asome weird ass questions.....I was extremeely nervous during mine...although the pics on the website mightn't capture that....( www.redbullmusicacademy.com by the way...the gallery section)
After that we had a lecture by Wally Badarou...he's from Benin/PAris...keyboard/synthesizer player...he's played with Fela Kuti, on most of Grace JOnes's records....worked with Sly and Robbie....JAmes Brown...played keys on that old Foreigner song...I wanna where love is...I want u to show me...
Not only is he old school...the man fully embraces technology...he's using a laptop nwadays.....just so refreshing to see older heads dong that man.......

Day 3 started with us all in the lecture hall and them playin a track from each of us...the purpose was to let everybody know what the next person's doing and who they'd like to collab with....I really want to work with this guy from Spain..he uses alot of samples and i like his vibe....
After that session there was a lecture by Kutcha Edwards...he's an Abooriginal Australian artist.....he spoke on the horrors done to his people...and reminded us how racist a country australia is...and how although shit seems nice on the surface it's one of the most overtly racist countries on earth.....I stepped to him after to tell him how much i appreciate him telling his story (tragedy....was separted from his parents from 2 years old to 17....lost his mother...father and brother..)....

Now.....I know you all must be saying...damn...my boy is having a blast over there....it has been..i won't lie, but one challenging i've been faced with is insecurity....I mean...I'm surrounded my musicians who've been doing this for years...who have labels and albums out (and i'm not jsut talking lecturers...the participants too..)...Also all the equipment in the studio is Mac based and none have software i use....so i'm slow with it...it's hard to ask someone who's versed in logic/reason etc to give u a chance to fiddle when they're in the middle of a track....Also the hours are different from last term..i got the impression that u could stay all night if u wanted to...they close the place at midnight.....
After having a sit down session with myself last night I've decided to switch the game up......I'm going to approach cats like Benji B, Steve Spacek and be honest with them..let them know where i am in this thing...and ask their advice on getting from where i am to the studios of some of my musical heroes.....
I'm also not going to be up int eh studios fiddling with equip,emt i wont own for another 5 years...i'm going to hold my corner...work on soem beats.....and apprach some of these guys..asking advice on how to make them better...

I've also identified a couple ohter participants (beatmaker from Spain...singer from mexico, MC from UK) would i'd like to collab with...so i'm going to approach them....

yeah...so that's what up....
I have a blog for Day 0-1 which is saved on my laptop upstairs...(i'm in th hotel lobby now)...as soon as they sort my room connction i'll post that too....

All in all i'm good y'al....really good...just giving thanx and enjoying this journey...

see ya tomorrow

In Safe and sound...jetlagged

2006-10-15T19:04:00.000-07:00

It's Monday morning....day 2 is about to get under way.....
I've been documenting the journey.....just that the internet connection in my room isn't working...supposed to be fixed this morning...I'm at teh academy right now.....
As soon as my own connection is up....i'll post what i've been up to them last few days...

t minus.....

2006-10-11T22:06:00.000-07:00

One of the best ways to beat jet lag is to get a good night's sleep the night before travel....
Tomorrow I begin the journey to OZ and here i am up at midnight...and still not finished packing....

One of the main reasons I'm up is because I've been trying to send some pictures to a writer of a magazine I did an interview with the othr day.....
My sis took them......I'm not happyw ith them though......its not her...it's me...I just don't look as strikingly handsome as I think i could....i dunno...D says she likes them...and i trust her...so we'll see......

Y'know...a friend of mine brought this up once....that when u see yoursefl doing something over and over and feeling it (visualization)....when the thing comes to pass it almost feels like deja vu....that's how i'm feeling now......I'm excited mind you, but it just feels familiar....

anyways....i need to go back and finish this binn-is......I'll be updating the blog on the regular while down unda....so stay tuned....

thanx for reading this you guys.....
be good

Well my friend....the time has come

2006-10-09T04:53:00.000-07:00

Today is monday.......
I'm scheduled to leave this thursday......if u're just starting to read this blog and don't know what I'm talking about......go back and update yourself...haha...

After a 3 week emotional rollercoaster ride everything/most things are in place....

As i posted in the last entry (or was it the 2nd to last....ah well) the aussie visa just came thru last week.....Now while here waiting and biting my nails...i halted all planning for the trip....
One of the big things i wanted/want to do is to put together 2 CD compilations to take with me to give out to folks down there....
One was to be called 'The Other JAmaica' the unoffical mix cd......It will feature jamaican artists I know of doing music other than the traditional dancehall.....I've contacted several people for tracks to put on said cd....and up until now..i've only received one......I'm expecting to make contact with the other people between today and tomorrow.......I plan on making about 30 copies...labbelling them.....I think I'll be doing someof the labelling while I'm in LA (10 hours in transit)....the important thing is to just get the tracks from these people....It's really last minute and totally my fault......I hope the people I've asked can see past my procrastination....I think this will be a good oppurtunity for them to get their music out there......who knows...

The 2nd CD was to be a compilation of beats/songs from a few people on okayplayer.com...Now for those of you who don't know www.okayplayer.com is a website created by ?uestlove of the roots and some other people back in 99 i think...I've been a regular (2-5 times a day...7 days a week) since early 2000.....I use it basically for the forums...I've met alot of folks there...(actually met a few in person while they were visiting JA).....I've learnt soooooooooooooo much about music from these people that i wanted to show my apreciation by putting together a CD with beats from people on there who've inspired/helped me out with advice critisicm etc....
Because of procrastination...I'm goign to have to abort that mission..there's just not enough time.......I just sent of some emails to the people i'd promised to include..expressing my humblest apologies....

What i'm also taking with me is a 'demo' of my own work......It will include my sunsplash mix plus a few tracks i've been working on over the last couple weeks.....

SO today....i plan to leave job#1 at about 2.....go buy a pack of 50 blank cd....some paper sleeves.....head home....call the local red bull people....tell them the travel agent still hasn't emailed me the final intenary....call the other folks i haven't received the music from.....head to job#2 at 5pm.......while there put together a playlist for my demo......leave job#2 at 8....go check a friend who lives across the road from said job......talk for a bit....been meaning to chill with him for a while.....come home.....wait for other people to bring their cds to me....start importing their cds to itunes.......then go to bed.....

Oh by the way....D pulled a surprise send off party for me last night......I was soooooooooooo easily duped...i mean..up until the second person came by...i was still like "wow...what a suprise seeing you here.." i still thought they were there coincidentally......turned out to be a really cool evening...some of these people I hadn't seen in MONTHS........and they all signed a card for me......i felt really special....hehehe.....

Anyways...there's always more to type, but never enough time....it's 7am I'm running late for work....

be good....

I hope to drop at least one more entry before I leave.......but you know how time is.....
but i'll be definitely updating you all from melbourne.....so stay tuned....

One Step Closer

2006-10-02T17:21:00.000-07:00

Got the visa today....
all systems go..

I've learnt so much between July 21 and now...

2006-09-28T04:28:00.000-07:00

....July 21 was the day I found out about being accepted to this year's RBMA.....
If you're reading this and asking yourself...."can't this man talk about anything else besides this fkin music academy".....don't come to this site again....for your own good don't...lol
Seriously.....next my family and close friends...this music is my life....and this thing is going to speed up the manifestation of my musical dreams/plans.....

anyways.....i was saying.....This has been such an emotional rollercoaster....from anxiety to shock to joy to excitment to intimidation to self doubt to confidence to faith to pessimism to passion to proscrastination to relief to worry to peace......

That's where i am now...at peace......
I really don't want to put the details of the last 2 months on this blog until I have my visa and ticket in hand....hell...i may just make that entry while i'm in melbourne......

I just want to say thanx to anybody reading this.....and special thanx to the few who've been sending me positive energy.....

talk later..
me

I wish I had blogged this week

2006-09-23T09:36:00.000-07:00

...This past week has been quite an adventure....
I'm scheduled to leave for melbourne in roughly 2.5 weeks...and I basically found out last weekend that my visa was not "being dealt with"......I blame myself partially..i should've been on them from day 1 about this.....but procrastination and faith in people got the best of me....
To summarize the week,.... lets just say it involved all of the following:
-fingerprinting
-police records
-insurance
-being locked INSIDE my apartment
-reaching work almost 3 hours late
-not going to work then driving to montego bay (3.5 hours one way) then back to kingston to reach work for 5pm
-weight loss
-1.5 meals a day
-angry co-workers

...and with all of that I got my visa application off to the australian high commission in Ottawa...it reached friday at noon and takes "a week" to process then they're going to send it to me via courieir...so it's cutting it close......but i'm pretty confident it'll work out....
Needless to say I'm exhausted....it's been a hell of a week.......I couldn't have done it without D though...the few times I felt like just leaving it in the hands of others she said to me...quite calmy...."how bad do u really want this?"...yeah...but that's another entry....

I got my hands on a double cd compilation of the music made at the academy last year........There's some really really good stuff on there...also some stuff i wasn't feeling...but on a whole the quality is pretty high...Initially i was a bit intimidated, but that gave way to some serious excitement......i can't stop thinking about this......

I got word from an australian team member and he says the live sets where we play in the clubs are scheduled to be approx 1.5 hours long.....Now if i play my music to people in front me for 5 minutes..i get nervous.......so u can imagine........at the same time though....i'm looking forward to the challenge....I'm in the process of polishing up some beats i have....I plan to 'recreate' them live and throw some music i'm inspired by in the mix too.....

It's Saturday....Term 1 of the music academy starts tomorrow....you can follow all the action live from monday at www.redbullmusicacademy.com
anways people...have a child to go feed now....

be good

The Power of Music...

2006-09-17T21:57:00.000-07:00

...can u relate to this?
Feeling really low....having a million things on your mind....feeling overwhelmed....feeling nobody really understands what you're feeling......
....then all of a sudden by 'chance' discovering a song from one of your favourite artists...the lyrics of which address most if not all the issues on your mind.....and the song sounds soooooo good..
Well that happened this weekend...yesterday I happened to hear a song by Talib Kweli...called Funny Money ...its on his myspace page www.myspace.com/talibkweli
I love this song man....the beat got me 1st....it was produced by Madlib....i 'happened upon' an mp3 of the song...and downloaded it to the iPod.......i kid u not..i've been playing it non-stop since yesterday....our daughter and I went on a 4 hour drive today...and i had it on repeat the entire ride.....yes i love it that much....

I'm saying all that to say.......that feeling that that song brought me....the feeling that everything's going to be ok...that i'm not the only one going thru this...that the only one stopping me is me......THAT is the feeling i want to give others with my music.....either directly or with the help of another instrumentalist/vocalist....
THAT feeling is why i do this.....THAT is the feeling i get when i'm in my zone....that's the feeling i'm addicted to....that's the feelingn I want my children to grow up seeing me experience....

nite nite

My turn....

2006-09-17T05:34:00.000-07:00

....well D gave me yesterday to myself....so it's my turn today...
Planning on checking some people I haven't looked up in a while......i know they'll be happier to see the little one than to see me...lol...
That's how it is nowadays....folks don't ask about me that much..it's all about her.....i mean i can't blame them..but hey...

I'm beginning to wonder if someone I don't want to see this blog has/is read/ing it......i don't know maybe I'm just paranoid, but I can't think of any reason why some of the shit that happened this week actually happened....another part of me is saying..that's just the way some people operate...and it's not personal...
Call me idealistic/naive...whatever, but I cannot understand why people say they'll do things and turn around and don't do them.....and it's not like I asked them to do it..they come to me with all these plans/suggestions then I have to be running them down to get them done....just know yourself and your limits...if its too much just say so....don't make these promises then pull out...and when i say pull out i mean...cut communication

I dunno...ms (fill in the blanks)..if you're reading this, i wish u no ill will...i'm just extremely dissappointed in you......

Things are better now....

2006-09-16T19:56:00.000-07:00

..had a lovely day today..D took the little one and gave my the day to myself...i listened to some music....put together some plans....feeling all confident again....feeling hopeful again....
i'm good

I can't sleep...

2006-09-15T02:24:00.000-07:00

...ever since I've known myself...I've never really had a problem sleeping...
I could've just had the worst day of my life....once i hit the bed...i fall asleep effortlessly....
Tonite is probably the 3rd night I can remember not being able to sleep.....
I'm at a point now where I just feel like giving up....no no no....not thinking suicide...not even close....so please don't start worrying.....
....Its just one of them days when it's so hard to stay positive when most things around you are 'in doubt'....by that I mean...i feel like 95% of the things in my life could change tomorrow....like a 180 degree change....
...don't know if i'm articulating it correctly........

..u see....I've trained myself over the last 2 or so years to focus my mind on what I want.......especially when what i don't want is in front of me..or looming on the horizon.........right now...at 4:30am friday september 15 2006 I'm tired of doing that....i don't have the enrgy to keep my thoughts positive.....
as a result i haven't been able to sleep.....my mind is wandering on all the posibble negative outcomes........

the comforting thing is.......when i usually get this low....i find there's always something good around the corner......

....i'm waiting...

So much to tell you guys, but.....

2006-09-14T17:06:00.000-07:00

....i don't want to post any of it till i have my ticket and visa in hand....
*shakes head*

Another week....

2006-09-10T20:38:00.000-07:00

...the weekend just flew by..
Had soo many things planned....got thru 1...
Was supposed to call up the dub poets i'm working with to give them the wav files of 2 tracks they wanted....did it, but didn't get around to calling them.....
was supposed to fill out some forms for the final step of registering the business....(yes it's still not done)....didn't do it...
..was supposed to work on a bio.....didn't do it..BUT was just chatting with my neighbour who works in the entertainment industry here...and she says she's done alot of bios and would be more than willing to do mine....i was supposed to email her the info and she'd fix it up.....didn't do it..

I got an email from redbull on friday saying they need a pic for some flyers they're handing out around melbourne...this is for the nights we'll each be playing our music...called up my sis..(photographer par excellence..again...i'm sure the spelling is off)....she came over yesterday and we had a little 'photo shoot'...got some pics with me around the eqipment....and some on the balcony outside.....they look amazing...to me at least....so i DID do that...and i emailed the pics to the melbourne team about 2 hours ago...

So...the weekend wasn't that unproductive.....i was tired though man....just felt like laying low...not seeing anybody...not answering any phone calls..(caller ID is the greatest thing next to...)..

Managed to catch the season premiere of HBO's series..The Wire tonite........i actually fell asleep for about 10 mintues about midway thru the episode...so i missed some stuff.....i don't know..it just doesn't feel the same with out stringer or avon......I have faith in the writers though...so i'll stick with them this season....

yeah....so the week that lies ahead.........have an interview with a local magazine on friday.....other than that..nothing else on the music side.....alot of other business stuff to sort out though....

anyways folks...u know how it goes...it's minutes to 11 now...i'm tired..should be asleep already..

be good...have a good week

2 down....bout 18 to go

2006-09-07T18:50:00.000-07:00

I got a call from another person I gave a CD to.....she was like...."I'm just calling to say I really love your music....it sounds really good...I can see why you got thru for redbull"......

I'm telling you man.....it's a beautiful thing when u create (or remix) something and someone tells you they love it.......i guess at the end of the day, at some level, we all went some kind of recognition/approval from others.....i'm here beaming as i type this...i just hung up the phone....
The person is in the entertainment induustry here..so i know she wouldn't say it if she didn't mean it.....

I went for what I thought was to be an interview with a 'lifestyle magazine' today, but turned out to be a meet and greet with a few of their writers and the marketing manager....we spoke...gave them an idea of what I was about...where I plan to take this music...and we set up a time next week for the actual interview.......I left there feeling kinda low cause I took a CD for them, but did not label it.....i just wrote my contact info on the sleeve.....It wasn't professional looking at all....anyways....like i always say..there's no such thing as a lasting 1st impression....I beleive i can always re-invent myself.....when i get to her next week...i'll have pictures (my sister/photographer par excellence {is that how u spell it?} is going to do my 1st photo shoot this weekend), bio and another CD with more tracks..this time properly labelled and ready......

That's about it though.....nothing else to report on the musical front......been working hard them last few weeks.....doing some extra hours at the clinics trying to pull in a little more $$ this month.....cause while I'm in melbourne....i won't be getting that job#2 money.....

Anyways folks....i'm really tired....its 9:03pm and I need to be in bed early tonite....

hope you're well

peace

Tell your story!!!!!!!!!!!!!..please

2006-09-02T06:07:00.000-07:00

...y'know..when i started this blog back in May I didn't (well actually I kinda) expect(ed) the response I've gotten from some of the folks who read this......I've been told "it's interesting"..."inspiring"....all kinds of good stuff....
I was just on my way home from jogging just now and I was thinking.....My life is pretty interesting...but so is everyone else's.....Yes you too...
I was watching something on BET J the other night..a show called My 2 Cents...was a group of young black artists/activists/professionals...they were talking about how important it is for one to tell one's story....We all have a story to tell....
So please...if you're reading this.....start a blog man.....send me a link....i want to hear your story..

n'joy your weekend people...and to my americanos....enjoy the labour day
peace

edit...yes i deleted it...i've seen the folly of my ways

It has begun

2006-08-31T16:18:00.000-07:00

...got a call from a local red bull rep just now....
She gave me the number of an editor of a jamaican magazine....I'm supposed to call her to set up a time to meet for an interview....it's no front page/4 page spread (if there's such a thing), but it'll be my 1st of many...

Y'know....it's days like this I feel like I'm being guided and I'm on the right track (sound familiar)....
I got up at 4am this morning...washed my hair and rolled my locs (yes u bald heads....locs do require work.....that's if u want them looking at least semi-neat...i can be a neat freak so I hate when they look all fuzzy.....a note to those of you who know me personally..if u ever see me with my hair looking all fuzzy and reaaly unkempt...know I'm under stress..and don't have the time to roll them...).....they were looking bad...so i decided i wouldn't leave the house till i got them lookin all shiny and neat and stuff....lol

Got up feeling good.....left home LATE....was playing with our daughter and caught up (along with D) in an internet message board discussion about the UN and Iran's nuclear program....
Got to work.....started off with only 21 patients registered..which is a light day...but it slowly grew to 35.....didn't take lunch with me so....i was HUNGRY by time i finished.......
Had a great lunch at this vegetarian place......If you're ever in kingston and want some good vegan food...check Earl's Juice Garden on Haining road...in NEw Kgn.....

ON my way home i started feeling kinda low....thinkin about money and how we 'need' to start investing in some property.......(we plan on getting into real estate)....and how much more we need for a down payment etc.......by the time i got home and heard our daughter shouting "DADA" as i walked up the stairs....i felt light...
I chilled with the family for a while then headed off to job#2 (where i am now).....
I got here about half hour early and decided to spend the time doing some visualization....i was sitting there 'dreamin' about how well this red bull thing is going to go...what i want to come out of it.......How i plan on resigning from job#1 ( i may just keep #2).....started thinking about the interviews i'm going to do.....
Now, I imagine i'm being interviewed often....not because I love being on tv (i'm quite shy), but because when i imagine these interviews I answer questions in my mind..i find it's a powerful visualization technique

....for example...lets say one of my dreams is working with janet jackson...I'd imagine an interviewer asking me..."so tell me how was it working with janet jackson..." And then i'd go on talking to myself (when i'm alone) 're'-creating the scene in my mind...i would talk about what she was wearing...what kind of track we did....how much i got paid...everything..down to the last detail.......
I visualized being interviewed and being asked about the australia thing before i got thru...and u know how that went....

So there i was 2+hours ago visualizing being interviewed about the redbull thing...then..out of the blue....the phone rings..it's one of the local redbull people.......(scroll back to the top to hear what she said)...

I'm getting more and more excited by the day......I really can't wait for this......2 weeks....trapped in a beautiful city 19 hours away from home with msuicians from all over the world..talking, listening and collaborating......whoa!!!!.....
I'm sooo grateful for this man......

I'm feeling really good today.....not so much about what's happening now, but what the rest of 2006 has in store....

Good nite folks....
hope i didn't bore you with my rambling
peace

Gratitude...

2006-08-30T20:36:00.000-07:00

I'm giving thanx for:
-my daughter
-my girlfriend/partner/wife/manager/advisor/fan
-my parents
-my sister
-friends
-music
-functioning ears
-that paycheck last week
-job#2
-my talents
-this laptop
-my music software
-my keyboard
-my MIDI controller
-that '96 baleno outside
-this nice apartment
-the internet
-love
-stress
-frustration
-realizing the last 2 are part of life and there's no avoiding them
-for having to see only 15 patients today

What r u thankful for??

Life has had me busy

2006-08-27T21:39:00.000-07:00

....y'know having family, working 2 jobs, following your dream, being a procrastinator is really hard work.....
So that's why I haven't been blogging as much..

Nothing new to report on the musical side....

I'm soooooo out of shape...haven't been joggin in ages...haven't juiced in weeks...not sleeping well at nights (going to sleep too late)......
I'm switching gears this week though.....

wish I had more to type here, but i don't....i do, but i'm really not in the mood....and some of you reading this know me personally and may look at me funny next time u see me if I type some of the things on my mind....lol
(i wonder what my grade 5 teacher Mrs. Christian would say if she read this blog....my grammar and spelling are atroshus....lol..get it??)

Hurricane Ernesto should have passed over us last night/today......all now...not a drop of rain....

anyways...a gone people....
have a peaceful, productive and joy filled week

Mark this date on your calenders....

2006-08-22T22:31:00.000-07:00

Monday January 1, 2007

good nite..

1 down.....bout 20 to go

2006-08-20T21:10:00.000-07:00

Several things happened since my last post....I want to tell you all so badly, but I can't until its official....
I'll just say....somebody I gave a CD to a few months back finally got back to me...said they LOVE it and would love me to work on their next album........their current/debut album is wicked!!...to me at least...hasn't been released in JA officially, but is available...it's making some noise in Europe....The person also says they can arrange for me to perform at a local spot here in JA "when i'm ready".......

I realized over the weekend that I really need to spend the next few weeks before i leave for melbourne sorting out the business side of this thing...I really dont think I'll be creating much if any new stuff b4 I leave...
In addition to sealing up the registering of the business and opening a bank account, I want to have or at least done all I can in getting registered with BMI...
So when I'm approached for work...i don't have to pull the 'gimme a 2 weeks lemme sort out some shit' line.....

Oh...got an email from redbull and apparently they're setting it up in such a way that we all get to perform our music live at a club or bar in melbourne....This will be the 1st time I'd be doing something like that....i'm excited though...I'm working on a concept for a live set......

anyways...again..i want to type more, but am falling asleep...its 11:30 and i have a long day ahead....

be good

Music vs The Music Business

2006-08-17T22:40:00.000-07:00

If someone told you that there's a difference between the two...you'd probably say..."yeah i know"......at least I would've said that....but last night I finally saw/heard/felt the difference....

I met up with some red bull reps tonite.....4 local people and a rep from panama...

We agreed to meet up at this seafood resturant....I thought the meeting was off...so i'd already eaten, but i got the call about 9:30-ish...hopped in the shower, grabbed 4 copies of the CDs i did for sunsplash and hit the road...
Driving there i was a bit nervous i must say.....

GOt in and felt totally at ease however......introduced myself....gave each of them (except 1 guy...didn't have enuff) a CD..and explained what it was about etc...we all started chatting....they were telling me again how excited they are about me getting thru...and that I was chosen out of 3000+ applicants (along with the other 59.....30 for each term)....i'm still freaking out about that....

anyways....after the initial questions about myself etc they started eating and the conversation shifted to daughters, women, men, sex, infidelity, hotels........I won't lie..at this point I started getting really bored....I started thinking about the beats I could be at home making .....
I felt really out of place...and it showed...i'm sure it did....

After they paid...we all walked out to the car park.....and the head local guy was like.....we need to arrange your ticket etc....I think i'm going to fly from JA to LA then to Oz.....they sau its about a 19 hour flight....He then pulled me aside and began explaining to me that i was now part of their 'family' and this is all part of it.....hanging out...chatting shit and eating.....he went to say that don't think that although they weren't asking all about my music they weren't interested..."this is just how we do things"......
I appreciated that...for real...he obviously picked up on my uneasiness...
We all said good bye and headed to respective cars......he then told me that thye're talking to some " media people"...to have someone accompnay me to melbourne.....Now initially i was like WHAT??!???...i don't want anybody talking to me on the flight over...i don't want anybody following me around melbourne......
Then it hit me.....these people want more jamaicans to apply.......they want to tell my story....in order to encourage these people....They want me to help them.....they have helped me by giving me this wondeful opportunity.......
I guess what I experienced last night was basically how they do business.....'breaking you into the family...having fun...then eventually getting down to business'.......so I promised myself to stay open and just enjoy the moment......

I wanted to type alot more about last night, but i'm running late for work..and have to log off now....

I'll be back later/tomorrow

I'm too tired to go to sleep...

2006-08-15T20:36:00.000-07:00

..U ever feel that way??
I mean...for me to go to bed now there're so many things for me to do...
1. Wash the dishes
2. Brush my teeth
3. Shower..
4. Go downstairs and make sure the door is locked......

I just want to drop on the floor and wake up in 2 weeks...

I'm tired man....and on top of that I'm sick.....comign down with the flu......fk coming down...its here man......I'm having a terrible cough...feeling chills..kinda...nose runnin all over the place...
My body has finally broken down.....I haven't been treating it right these past few weeks....

We (me, D and the princess) were planning to go listen to some live music tonite...the same venue I mentioned in two earllier posts.......A friend is also goign and said she'd introduce me to some local music cats...(there i go using the word cats again....lol)..i would have also handed out a few beat cds......
Decided not to go...jsut stay in get some rest and feel better for the long day i have tomorrow (nothing music related..just work)......
Well...it's 10:35 and I'm still not in bed..so so much for getting a good night's sleep....

I'm just too tired to go to sleep......
Anyways....i'm off my people...going to wash them dishes, brush my teef, showa, go downstairs make sure everything's locked.....then go to bed...

peace

I wrote up my resignation letter today....

2006-08-14T19:50:00.000-07:00

..I was at work today and I nearly lost my mind....
This job is really getting to me......
Now, as I've said before....I'm grateful for this job....if it wasn't for it, I'd still be working nights/weekends and wouldn't have half the time I have now to spend with my family and work on this music.....
....but today was the point.....I was sitting at my desk and it hit me...I have to go....i have to go....

Now I don't plan to hand in the letter anytime soon.....I typed it up....printed it and going to stick it on the wall beside me.....I've addressed it to my supervisor and said I'll be resigning as of November 2 2006....NOw November 2 is the date i'm SUPPOSED to return to work after I get back from Melbourne.......I don't know how....i honestly don't have a clue, but I'm not going back to that job after Melbourne.....I know some oppurtunity will present itself....and this opportunity will also bring in a stream of income more than my present jobs do.......

So why did I type up the letter....???....I hear you asking.....lol....well....it's a form of visualization....something I believe in strongly...something I practice regularly...not as much as i'd like to but something I do....

Before getting thru for australia...i visualized myself there.....The day I found out this years academy was going to be held in melbourne....google up an image of melbourne and put it as my desktop....everytime I look at that pic (most times at least) I imagine that i'm one of the little people I see walking on the street.....
I'd be driving home from work and literally start screaming with excitement.....imagining I'd just found out I'd been accepted....this is before I actually found out......i received a few stares from other motorists...lol
I would be sitting down thinking about the clothes I'm going to wear to the academy....this is b4 i actually found out.....
Hell....i even know what my iPod playlist is going to be during the flight to australia...and this is BEFORE i found out....

So...you'll be wasting your time if you try convincing me that visualization doesn't work.........

I'm saying all that to say....that's why I wrote up my resignation letter today......
and come november 2, 2006....i'll be somewhere else, having fun, making music and making more money than i am now.......

I've been on a creative go slow since sunsplash.....I've really ran my body down them last few weeks....I've been locked away in the apartment behind a computer and some equipment....not sleeping well...i think during the 3+ weeks the girls were away..i probably actually went to bed twice....the other 20+ nights I fell asleep over the keyboard...or fell asleep listening to the beat i just made.....i also have not been jogging (i'm really beginning to doubt my chances for running this marathon in december....but that's another post).....I'm getting the flu or some virus pretty often.....i mean I haven't been taking care of myself....straight up....

I planned to be in bed tonite by 9pm....its now 10 and i still have some other sht to do b4 i turn in.....ahhhhhh boy...self discipline is a hell of a thing......

Anyways....there's always tomorrow....

g'nite folks...
be safe

Plan it...Package it...Distribute it...Sit back and wait

2006-08-09T21:11:00.000-07:00

Yeah...so this past weekend was Reggae Sunsplash at Richmond Estate, St. Ann's Jamaica...
This marked the return of the festival....it had been 'm.i.a.' for about 13 years i think....
I don't think the organizers were planning to make a profit this year.....i think this year was a 'warning shot'...an announcement that Reggae Sunsplash is back.......
The venue was PERFECT....huge open space....they said it can hold up to 100K people......the biggest night had approx 10K from my estimate...but can i tell you....the shows for the most part were great...

Now..if you've been following this blog you know sunsplash was to be the stage for me to hand out copies of a cd i put together with some of my latest beats...the twist was that each beat incoporated samples from songs by artists who performed at the festival....

Things didn't go as smoothly as I had planned....now 1st up...the original plan was to hand these cds out to everybody....While walking onto the grounds friday night...a wave of nervousness overtook me....i thought to myself..."how in god's name can u give out this thing to any and everybody......I mean it's not mixed properly" ....most people unless they're musically inclined mightn't get it....all kinds of negative self-sabotaging thoughts were going thru my mind....
So right then and there....i decided to give them only to people who were musicians (pro..amateur..whateva).....to local and overseas media heads and anyone my spirit took to....
So on the 1st night i walked with 30 cds and gave out 1....yes ONE.....lol....a little more than one the 2nd night...the last night even more.....

I'm really glad i did this because it taught me just how hard self promotion can be....and that it's a skill that requires practice...one major lesson i learnt was that...when promoting your shit...NEVER EVER use any negative phrase in your conversation with your 'customer'...by that i mean...never say shit like..."this is NOT mixed properly.....this is NOT orginal....this is NOT something you would hear on the radio...etc.." everytime i approached someone and used a negative term...i saw their body language change......they would be like..."hmm..ok..i guess i can take it"....
U have to give them a reason to want to listen to your shit......
What i did do on the last night was to approach people and be like..."hey..sorry to disturb you, but do you have one of these already....no??...aight well here u go...enjoy"...there was a huge difference in their responses with that approach...it was a "hmmm....i may need to get up on this?"
So how many cds did i give out.....about 20.....gave one to Dean Fraser....if you don't know who dean fraser is here's a quick intro . I've been trying to meet with him for a while now, but our schedules just haven't synched up....I've never had more than a 1:13 second cell phone conversation with him, but he's seems soooo cool....really down to earth and humble.....I want to sit with him and talk about the future of black music...get his take on where its headed and get some feedback on the plan i have for my my music....
Gave some out to a few journalists...some friends I hadn't seen in a while and some journalists from overseas....
SO we'll see where this goes....

I tell you though.....giving out the cds was alot harder than i thought....I'm my own worse critic...so I'm constantly thinking how awful my stuff sounds....I stood up beside a lady for about 10mins b4 i mustered the courage to approach her with a CD.....lol
If 'nothing' comes out of this...i'm just glad that i did it...it took alot of mental fortitude for me to approach strangers and give them a piece of my soul...that's what this music is basically.......I mean i now have a newfound respect for artists who sell shit out the trunks of their cars etc......its not as simple/easy as it looks.....

Here this though......
I had an all access wrist band...i could go ANYWHERE on the grounds..ANYTIME....by myself.....
After Junior Gong left the stage...some of the females i was working with went backstage to get a picture with him......i followed and left because I "didn't want to be seen as a groupie"......45 mins later they come running back to me with pics of them and the 'Youngest Veteran' on their Motorola razor (rzr....whateva) screens......
If was more patient and honest enuff with myself....i would have stayed with them...after they got their hugs and pics...i hand him a cd...tell him what its about....tell him i'd like to work with him....then walk away......
And there's a fkin Bob Marley remix on there.....ARRRRGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!.....
ah well......

So what's next on my musical journey I hear u asking yourself...lol..
Well I was thinking about starting up a podcast, but that plan is on the shelf for noww....long story....that's another post....
I plan to have a band together in a years time.....that's right...by August 2007 I will have a band.....I already know how many members I want....and i've spotted one of the vocalists.....I saw her perform the other........lemme stop b4 i give away too much......
Now...mind u I have NO idea how i'm going to meet these people never mind convince them to come aboard.....but it will come together....
I've learnt a few things during my 30 trips around the sun and one of them is not to worry about the 'hows'...just worry about the whats..ie what it is u want.....hows of how it will manifest will present itself in due time.......

I've also started to figure out a new software program called Abelton Live.......i plan to use that program along with keyboard etc for the band.....no new news from the redbull folks....

listen my eyes are falling down...it's 15mins past midnite.....lemme log off before i lose my glass clark boot and end up turing back into an average step brother....

till nexx tyme

I felt like an adult today...

2006-07-31T17:01:00.000-07:00

......i know it sounds funny, stupid even....but today I was seeing a patient....she and her mom came to the clinic for me to fill out a medical report for her new school....when she told me her date of birth was x day, y month 1994...I froze.....
That was the day i left home as a young fresh and green 18 year old.....and headed back to jamaica to start my studies at UWI......it was surreal......here I was looking at someone who was born on that day....a day when I thought I was adult...i felt all grown up......just seeing a living breathing person in front of me who was born on a day that sticks out in my mind was weird....lol

Yeah.....so I'm here relaxing...D and our little one will be back in a week......missing them like crazy........
Found out over the weekend that we (medical team for Reggae Sunsplash) won't be staying at this top flight hotel 5 mins from the venue, but will be at another one about 30mins away.......so there goes my plans for running into Steel Pulse's manager and handing him/her a CD.....Just means I'm going to have to hand out more of them at the venue itself.....I was running from that cause while there I'll be dressed in scrubs and I wonder how serious someone will take a doctor handing them a CD.....My pitch will be...."excuse me...do u have one of these already"...handing them the CD...."no??...well u can't leave tonite without one....i'm just helping out a friend"...lol

Yeah I know some of you are probably sayin...don't be ashamed of what u do......you're a doctor who makes music.....say that.....welll my dear friends...truth be told.....the contact time with someone I give the cd to won't be more that 10 seconds tops.......and there's so much music out there.....people automatically assume any CD they're handed is weak...average at best....and 1st impressions count.....So unless i have the time to break down why i do this and who my influences are etc....they'll probably just htink I'm some rich doctor who bought a studio and makes music when he's not on call to 'feel creative'......and that's so not true....lol

Yeah....i updated my myspace page...kinda....i put 4 new tracks on there......feel free to have a listen if you're open

Grey Green and Blue....was done yesterdya actually...its still in progress, but i kinda like it....the name...grey represents how outside looked while i was making it...was raining.......blue is kinda the mood i was in...not a depresesed blue, but a calm, serene easy going blue......and green.....welll.....

The other 3 are tracks I've put on the CD to hand out at sunsplash....they're all made using old school reggae songs.....i've basically looped and chopped pieces of the orginal and added some minor spices to try and change it up somewhat......

MAgic Moments...is a flip of Buju's Magic City.....Planetary Crisis uses Steel Pulse's Earth Crisis....this one probably has the least amoount of added material...apart from the kick, snare hi hats and the percussion..everything elase is from the original...just chopped/filtered and eq'd...
Natty...is from Natty dread by bob marley...

So what am i up to for the rest of the night....
GOing to read the latest edition of Remix that came in the mail today.........

Haven't heard from the local redbull people since the meeting on thursday....but i'll keep you posted...

peace

The voice of reason...

2006-07-27T17:04:00.000-07:00

...I ended the post this morning saying I basically can't stand the thought of a the possible media hype surrounding this red bull thing.....
Called D (who's overseas right now) and was venting my frustration......she 'quietly' reminded me that any media attention this gets is an excellent advertising platform for the production company......and as usual...she's right.....

Ok..so lets fast forward to this evening....
I just got back from the meeting with the local RBMA rep here.....and she's telling me that I"m the 1st person to be accepted from the Caribbean....since the academy's inception.....and she's so proud of me....it has done alot for jamaica...the caribbean...yadda yadda yadda.....To be honest I was kinda shocked....1st in the caribbean......
Then she went into the appearances they have planned for me......can't let it out of the bag yet, but it involves tv, newspapers, magazine and a documentary.......
Part of me is excited...another part is scared...another part is apprehensive...another part is grateful.....i mean...alot has happened in the past 6 days.......and what 'scares' me is that this is just the beginning.....

Although I'm 'shocked', alot of what has happened and is to come are things I've been visualizing over the past year or two......Like a friend said...its a deja vu kinda feeling....

whoa....i'm feeling a little overwhelmed right now.....
signing out.....

Ok...here's 'The Plan'

2006-07-27T04:59:00.000-07:00

...well at least the original plan...
I got a call about 2 months back asking if I would be open to work on the medical team at Reggae Sunsplash..for those who don't know..sunsplash is a reggae festival in JA..it hasn't happend in about 13 years I think...so this is their 1st year back......without thinking twice I said yes.
One morning on the toilet (where i do alot of thinking and reading)...I asked myself...how can working at sunsplash help out my music....?
Now mind you, Sunsplash is ALL reggae...and I don't consider my music reggae (which reminds me...i still haven't done that JAmaican Music post I've been meaning to..anyways)......
So i said...what if I used some reggae songs and flipped/chopped/looped them and add my own flavour to them....then hand out some cds....

I started off by envisioning the reactions I wanted from people who would hear the cd..."wow...fresh....new shit...never heard reggae like this before.....very creative...could u produce an album of this stuff"....with that in mind i proceeded to plan it...

The plan was to make 7 tracks..using songs from 7 of the artists slated to perform at Reggae Sunsplash....burn 77 CDs and hand them out at the venue...I'd give them to any performers I ran into on the grounds...anybody that looked 'official'....and patrons as they were leaving the venue....
I was to have finished the tracks by July 22 (just finished an hour ago) and give a copy to 2 friends and my sister....along with 20 blank CD-Rs...They would burn 4 cds a day on their laptops (2 in the am...2 in the pm)....I would also do the same....in 5 days (today) we should have had 80 CDs...
I would then print out some labels with this software I have and spend the next week labelling them...taking my own sweet time....Finishing just in time for Sunsplash on August 3....

But you know life doesn't always go according to plan......I couldn't come up with more than 6 tracks...the artists used were : Steel Pulse, UB40, Everton Blender, The Mighty Diamonds (2 from these guys) and Buju Banton........
At the end of the day..i wasn't happy with the UB40...so that got scrapped....and one of the Mighty Diamonds sounded too close to the original so that got scrapped...which leaves 4......
I decided to add the Bob Marley remix I did to Natty Dread to the list as well.....so that leaves us with 5 tracks....

I sequenced them in the best way I could've....start with 2 above average ones...weakest in the middle and end with 2 of my favourites.....
So I'm going to burn 2 copies this morning b4 I leave for work and drop them off to my 'manufacturers'....
Listening to them now...to be honest I'm only really impressed with the Buju one....I used the song Magic City and looped a......forget it....you'll hear it when I put them on my myspace page....

Yeah..so that's where we are with The Plan......It's offically titled For Headphones Only Vol. 4 (SSE) .....sunsplash edition...

In other news....i got a call from a local red bull agent......wants to meet up with me today......Now I'm grateful to redbull for this glorious oppurtunity, but I CANNOT STAND this coporate/marketing/redbull the brand/we're so cool bullshit.....I just want to get to australia and meet some people and share some music man.....anyways...maybe i'm just overreacting and it'll be real cool.....we'll see.....

have a good day folks....
haven't ran since saturday........if I keep this up there's no way I'll be ready for this marathon in december.......

peace

It still hasn't hit home....

2006-07-23T20:27:00.000-07:00

I got the email friday afternoon and I'm still in shock..well kinda....it's a weird feeling...i'm ffeling all kinds of things at the same time.....

The good news has not halted works on 'The Plan'...there have been some modifications however...and it's going to be 6 tracks long instead of 7...

So the next steps on my path to total conquest are as follows....
-Complete 'The Plan'
-Distribute 'The Plan'
.....after that's out the way...i'm going to link with a few bands/musicians who are a little alternative...i.e. not mainstream dancehall, reggae......
I want to put together a 2CD compliation of local artists pushing the envelope and carry this compilation with me to Melbourne...use it as a vehicle to get others' sound out there tooo......

Man..i'm so excited...i have so many plans....enough time to execute them all if I stay focussed....

2006 is indeed shaping up to be THE year.....

For those not familiar with the redbull music academy....here's a lil something from their site:

What does an average day at the Academy look like?

Each morning participants, team and lecturers gather on-site, checking emails and grabbing liquid refreshments. The building is bubbling with activity as we prepare for the day's guest speakers to take the famous Academy couch.
There, armed with a mic and a turntable or a piece of hardware, each guest explores crucial know-how, sharing the dreams that pushed them forward to where they are. Since the legendary first session back in '98, when Jeff Mills revealed his transglobal hotel secrets, the Academy lectures have offered a chance for participants to glean those pearls of renegade wisdom.

Then, after breaking-down chord progressions and wising-up to business pitfalls, it's time to hit the beats. Participants have the chance to DJ one-on-one and sketch out mixes, or collaborating on tunes, flipping styles.It's free time, and anything could happen. You might find yourself exchanging licks with your favourite Reggae-Soul composer in a studio session, or writing sentimental lyrics with a Scandinavian singer/songwriter at a milkshake bar.

The building echoes with noise and music well into the night, and then we head out on the town. All the Academy attendees get down to each other's sets, forging links and recording memories, all the time checking ways to develop their vibe.

Have a good week people....

Melbourne...here I come

2006-07-21T14:25:00.000-07:00

I made it folks....Redbull accepted.....I'm going to Austrailia...

Have some calls to make...people to tell....
I can't get through to D...she and the little one are overseas right now...and the cell is off...

Oh my god......i can't.....i mean i can believe it....

YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Walking in the dark....

2006-07-19T05:29:00.000-07:00

..I went out last night...to the same spot i visited a few weeks back...remember the one the bored/annoyed me.....
Saw some amazing stuff this time around....All the bands I saw did their thing....they were well rehearsed....on point...sounded good.....The band I went to see in particular didn't do the best they could've done...at least that's what I thought.....wasn't their fault...they sound man really messed them up....we couldn't hear the back up vocals....the band on a whole was playing over the singers......I could see where they were goign though....they're pretty good....they inspired me...although i'd luv to see them again with better sound..
The highlight of the night for me was the featured band.....made up of an unassumingly talented guitarist/vocalist, a female singer (who gave me goose bumps), a keyboardist, drummer and a funky white bass player.....they floored me....
I want to tell u the names of these bands, but I'm still not sure how people would react to having their names on some guys blog....The other band's/groups i've mentioned b4 in previous blogs have their own websites and I don't think they'd mind the promotion, but ....anyways...i'm straying...

A strange thing happened after I left the venue last night.......on the way out I saw the female vocalist from the band that hit me hard...I touched her on her arm and told her that I really loved what they did...and they're to keep it up...Walking down the steps I felt inspired....was going home to get behind my equipment and push something out b4 bed (this about 2:00am).....On the way home I thought about where I plan to take my music and where I am now...and it hit me.....The 2 places are MILES apart....i mean..i'm NOWHERE near where I want to be musically.....Then I got really scared..doubt crept in....how will I do this?...they're so many things to learn....what if people don't like what i'm trying to do?........I had some of my beats playing in the iPod on the way home...and they ALL sounded terrible...even the ones I'm working on for 'The Plan'........I felt like I was walking in the dark....feeling around..wanting to go somewhere, but not being able to find my way...

It got worse......I got home at 2......called a friend of mine....(i knew he'd be up, plus I had to tell him about a conversation I had with a mutual friend I had seen at the venue)...... I then committed the cardinal sin of telling him how I was feeling..,....I've learnt the hard way..that u never talk about your dreams with people you know who don't support/believe in you 10000%....even if they're your good friends/family...they WILL (most times unintentionally) slip their doubts into the picture.....
YEah so said friend goes on to say basically..."unless U have some music that I haven't heard that will blow me away....i don't think you're going to make it man....i think you should come back to medicine...."
I know I sound like i'm whining and complaining, but if I had heard this some other time i would've just ignored it, but coupled with the feelings of fear and doubt I was having, it hit me hard.....I started to think...."what if he's right?".......What if my former boss is right? (went to say hi to my former depatment on friday...and everybody was syaing they miss me etc... the head prof looked at me and said...I know you'll be back...basically that my calling is there...)......

So i fell asleep and woke up feeling really low this morning.....don't feel like going to work..don't feel like doing a thing.......
But at the same time there's this quiet voice whispering to me......."this is part of it....it's days like this that make u grow...both as an artist and as a man".....I hope the voice is right

A night on the town

2006-07-16T01:01:00.000-07:00

...well not actually a 'night' night....but I did leave the apartment on a saturday night...If u know me well....that is quite a feat...
With the girls overseas..and the deadline for "the plan" soon approaching my default mode was to stay in tonite..lock myself away behind my equipment...but tonite I went out with my neighbour..
We went to a party which featured a popular roots reggae band Rootz Underground and a local vocalist Tessanne Chin and her band....I enjoyed it....
Now this is the difference between a night like tonite and the one I spoke on a few weeks back....These performers had their shit together....u can tell they rehearsed for hours....they take pride in their show...Although the music ms. chin does isn't up my street I respect it...and most importantly I left inspired...

On the way back my neighbour and I are talking....(she's the one i told u about who "feels and understands" my music)....she tells me a company has approached her to do a tv ad..they need some music, but aren't willing to pay for any...its a limited time ad...will run for about a month...
They were going to use some obscure dance music....she apparently told them that she knows someone (me) who has some music....
To cut a long story short....I'm giving them some music...yepp..giving..not selling.....No money....at first the thought didn't sit well with me...still doesn't actually, but its early....I need to get my sound out there more than i need money...so your boy's music is going to be featured in a television ad (which reminds me...i need to get a contract together basically telling them they can't use the music after a certain period of time).....any referrals after this will be handing over some $$....believe that.....

Yes folks...so it's 3:15 am....wanted to go walking at 5am, but I don't think that's going to happen...
So right now..I'm going to bed.....going to fall asleep to some good music...

peace

Y'know...one of the hardest things about....(edit)

2006-07-12T19:31:00.000-07:00

...being on this journey is avoiding doubters and nay-sayers...especially when they are people u love.....
My parents....i love them.....i see them in me everyday.....but there comes a point when u have to avoid negative energy......now don't get me wrong..my parents are far from negative people....they're very positve people...they've both come from very humble beginnings and done very well for themselves..i think they did a pretty good job raising my sister and I.....They've also shown me that love really can see see u thru....(sounds corny i know...but u know what i mean..lol)
Thing is....they (as most parents do) have a vision of who they see their children becoming......and the vision i have for myself is nowhere near theirs for me.....So everytime we talk on the phone (they're a 2 hour flight away)...there's this tone in our conversations....its like they're prodding to see what I'm up to...when i'm going to "come to my senses" and do some post graduate studies...move back home and help run the family business......so I invariably hang up feeling drained....and doubting myself...whether I'm on the right track..whether or not i'm wasting my life.....
I know they love me and will do anything for me, but right now at this stage of my life....i can't be around them.......they'd kill my dreams man......and not intentionally either....

Since becoming a father i've understood their point of view a bit more, but everyday i look at our daughter i pray that i have the faith in her and in her upbringing to allow her to be whoever/whatever she wants to be.....

whew....that took alot to write....

On to better news.....i got a copy of the roster for the music festival i'm working at and it turns out on thursday i'm working from 2-11pm...but i'll be on call...meaning i won't be frontline....just if things get hectic...which means if i get there a little after 2 things should be ok....and on friday i work the 11pm to 8am shift....which also means that i don't have to rush back down after work on friday...i even have time to catch an hour or 2 sleep before leaving.....So things are working out....It's things like this that make me feel I'm being guided...like i'm not alone.....

In yet other news, D and our lil one are flying out for about 3 weeks....a friend of our's mom is in the hospital and not doing well...so she and some other friends are flying down to be there for her......the apartment becomes quiet again......
Going to miss them.......on the flip side...it affords me more time to work on 'the plan'..not having our favourite one year old running around.....so we'll see....
And on yet another side.....this whole thing reminds me just how short and unpredictable life is....and how important it is to connect with those we love as much as we can....D always tells me though...i can't change my parents..they have their outlook on life....and that's that...what i can change is how i let it affect me......i guess i'm just going to have to find some way of having some middle ground.......

Yeah...so i'm off...its just after 10....going to spend some time with D and 'help' aka watch her pack....
nite y'all

Things are beginning to get interesting...

2006-07-11T19:52:00.000-07:00

.....First up..i think I'm going to abandon my efforts to give each post a song title....after re-reading my last post and seeing how corny it sounded....lol

Well...today...i spoke to president of our association who was trying to bargain with our supervisors to give me 2 days leave so i could attend this music festival (i'll tell u the name etc as time gets closer)..I'm on the medical team for all 4 nights....thursday to sunday...I'm planning to use the event as a platform to give out copies of "The Plan"......Long story short..i can't get the leave....they're telling me I would have had to apply for it 3 fking months in advance....Now i don't know who knows 3 months in advance when they need leave...life isn't that str8 forward man.....I think they're on to me though..they figure its a holiday weekend and they suspect i at least want to attend this festival....
So what am i goign to do??......Well....go to work EARLY that day...leave at 11:30...cut a 3 hour drive to 2 hours...get to the event at 1:30-2pm thursdya....work till 11pm....drive back to town (3 hours)...go to wrk early the friday morning leave again at 11:30...speed out to the event and work again till 11....I spoke to one of the organizers just now...she says that'd be fine.....she said it with a "is this man crazy" kinda tone......I could've just told her that I can't make it the thursday....but i made a commitment to them....and plus not going thursday night would be one less night to put the plan in effect....so wish me luck....I'll be drinking alot of redbull over those 2 days.....

Speaking of which....I got an email from Redbull (if you've been following my saga...if not...go back and look it up)...saying they've received my package and I should know my fate by july21.....I'm already here trying to figure out how I'm goign to get 2weeks leave to attend if it comes thru........ah well one step at a time....

In other news....the aformentioned plan is still behind schedule...i'm halfway thru...and have just 1 week left before i planned to start putting on the finishing touches......I don't know how, but i'm looking forward to seeing myself pull this one off....the next 7 days are going to be pretty interesting......

I've been meaning to post a bit on Jamaican music....from the perspective of a 30 year old, jamaican who grew up in antigua listening to rap music, r&b and jazz...

next time

be good people

I'm cool like dat...cool like dat...cool like dat...

2006-07-07T19:25:00.000-07:00

..i'm so cool man....
It's like friday night man...and I'm at home man...around a computer man....and guess what I'm doing after i type this blog man.....going out??....naw...I'm goign to sleep man......lol..

Yeah....yet anova fry-dy nyte approaching 9:30.....about to go to bed...to wake up at 2....putting a few hours then hit the road for our Official Palisadoes run tomorrow morn at 4:30......

The alarm went off at 2:27am this morning...but i didn't get up till 3:30....put in just over a hour and ahalf worth of music...then went for a run at 5:30.....
Had a hectic day at work today....the nurse i work with who also sees patients was off on a workshop..so i was on my own......
left the clinic came home had something to eat..fell asleep with our daughter on the bed..got up at 5...took her with me to the supermarket....stopped at a record store hoping to get some new music.....i was THIS close to picking up the new Busta Rhymes.....but i didn't...i mean i love busta and all, but I want some NEW shit...something that blows me away....
Picked up Corrine Bailey-Rae....that pretty english singer with the sexy accent (i don't know them imperialists really did a number on me..cause i think a female english accent is soooo sexy..lol)...anyways...sampled the cd and put it back on the shelf....sounded boring to me....She sounds good..don't get me wrong...and if she wrote the songs she's a wonderful writer, but again...it didn't blow me away.....
Then i picked up the new Red Hot Chilli Peppers....Was about to buy it...but decided to hold back.....i ended up ordering the new Zero 7 ...The Garden ( 2 people who heard my stuff say some of it reminds them of zero 7...i've never bought one of their albums, but its funny..i have an electronica compliation---the Chill out sessions..and their song was one of my favourites...that was about 4 years ago...i never knew it was them).....and TV On The Radio's new one...Return to Cookie MOuntain ....
After that went to the supermarket.....spent way too much money on unneccesary stuff...(we really didn't need the tub of soya ice cream (but it tastes sooo good with them golden raisins we have in the fridge)...ah welll....our daughter was turning heads as usual....I wonder if got this much attention from strangers when i was her age...doubt it...i wasn't half as cute....lol

After supermarket...came home and watched Entertainment Report..a local entertainment show...and had me thinking alot of about jamaican music, but that'll be tomorrow's post...its almost 9:45 the girls are asleep...and i need ot do the same......

I shoulda titled this one..day in the life of.....

Peace

JDavey...JDavey...J*Davey

2006-07-06T19:28:00.000-07:00

Please..please please.....if u love good music...if u love artists who are pushing the envelope.....if u want to hear something new and fresh.......Check out these guys...
http://www.jdaveybaby.com/
To me, these guys are the future....they're what black music needs today....maybe i'm overhyping them, but what I've heard so far has blown me away....just something fresh......Have't heard anything this fresh since the 1st time I heard Erykah Badu back in mid-late 90s.....Not comparing them to Badu, but the feeling they give me...is the feeling I got from BAdu back then... its the feeling i get from J-Dilla's work..the feeling i get when i'm making music i love...the feeling I'm trying to give others with my music....

Update on 'The Plan'..
Well..i'm behind schedule.......for those who're just joining us...it's a musical project I'm working on.....some would call it a demo.....and that's basically what it is....its a demonstration of what i do......I'm planning to basically burn and label some copies at hand them out at a certain festival this summer......That's all i can say about it now...as time winds down I'll put out in the open....

Anyways....it's 9:40pm....was supposed to be in bed already....still have a kitchen of dirty pots and plates to clean and a shower to take.....Will be up again by 2:45....put in 2 hours of music....go joggin at 5 and go to work.......

peace y'all

Blocked

2006-07-05T20:18:00.000-07:00

...I'm sitting here...it's 10:20pm...and I'm suffering from beat block....
I'm waay behind schedule with 'the plan'......I should be half way through already...i'm not even quarter way yet......It'll get done though...it has to..

I'm good for the most part though....we went for the run last saturday morn.....well kinda....we got out there....drove to the finish line..parked my car..got in my partner's...drove to the starting point......now about 15 mins into the run...i realize i forgot my keys in his car....so if we ran to the finish line (my car) we'd have to run/walk back........lol
So we ended up going halfway and turned back....it rained and there was was some strong wind...was quite an experience....we planning to do the full thing htis coming saturday...

The day is winding down for the redbull people to reply...they said July 14......
Now i'm going to say this....and i've never said this before...and i've always rolled my eyes whenever i hear others saying it, but......i was listening to the music i submitted and i think its weak......Why??....it's not very polished, not well mixed, the tracks themselves (with the exception of 1 or 2) don't have many changes...they're a bit monotonous......
I prefer the 6 or 7 I've created since I sent off the application.....
ahh well...we'll see.....
I'm still keeping my thoughts on going.......hopefully someone sees thru the inadequacies..and sees where i'm taking it....

Feeling a bit low right now...dont know why really.....
don't think I'll be making any music tonite......just going to kck back and for the 1st time in like 3 weeks..i'm not goign to go to sleep with a pair of headphones on or me thinking about how best to mix this track or some music related shit....

g'nite folks

Cris Track shoes and a thick bobby socks..

2006-06-30T18:49:00.000-07:00

.....words from Freddie McGregor's 1980 hit Joggin....I'll try and post an mp3 of that tomorrow...
That song to me epitomizes the sound of Jamaican music in the late 70s early 80s...at least the music i was hearing as a 5..6 year old....

I chose that as the title because in a few hours...my jogging parnter and I will be embarking on the biggest run of our 6 month off and on running carreers....We'll be joggin the Palisadoes y'all...The distance wouldn't be the longest we've run, but the conditions will be the hardest....no trees for shade...no soft dirt trails...just hard hot concrete and strong see breeze....We're trying to start at sunrise (5am).....Did i mention i was trainig for a marathon this december??....I've been slacking big time...so i think i may end up jsut doing the half marathon, but we'll see....

It's been an up and down week......told u about the up and some of the downs already....
I'm exhausted right now.....didn't get much sleep last night...(our daughter refused to allow us to sleep last night....and as tired as i am..her mother's even more tired)....so i'm off to bed now...it's almost 9pm...the plan is to wake at 2:30am....put in 2 hours on 'The Plan'...then hit the road for our 'big run'......

Be safe folks.....
peace

I lied today......

2006-06-28T20:38:00.000-07:00

....met up with the guy i should've met with last night....seemed really cool...
We chatted briefly about the frustration that comes with trying to release 'alternative' music in Jamaica....NOw by alternative i mean...anything outside typical dancehall or reggae...

Protecting the identities of the innocent, this guy is the road manager of a pretty famous jamaican dancehall star......i'm not talkng about shaggy, or damian marley........plus he (the guy i met) is part of a group that does some really interesting work....u can check out their music page here . I guess that kinda gives it away huh??

Anyways...he seemed like a real cool guy...genuine...loves music outside the box....I handed him a cd....said he liked the title (for headphones only) and would email/call me with the feedback...I just caught him too, cause my neighbour who had put me onto him said they were goign on tour from today.....He was just about to leave for the airport when i got to his place....

So after we spoke...and i was walking away...he turned and asked me...."so u like the vibe at the $&*&$#* last night?".....Honestly...i didn't like it I thought the crowd was really pretentious..(am i using htis word correctly??).......some of the acts were really poor......
When he asked the question...i looked at my cd in his hand....thought about stroking his ego and i said..."yeah man..it was cool".....u see he's also the organizer of this thing....
Truth be told....i respect what he's doing..and that is needed here in jamaica....because to be honest....it gets a bit monotonous when everytime u hear of jamaican music..u think of either dancehall (bounty killa, beenie, etc) or 'concious' (i hate that word) reggae.....
but some of cats i heard last night need to really step their game up or find another passion to pursue.

A few years ago (b4 i actually started making music) my thinking was...there's no such thing as "bad" music...there's music u love and there's music u don't feel......but honestly after putting in many a sleepness night, arguments with my partner (in the early days,...she's my biggest fan/critic now...words can't express the...anyway that's another post), having to deal with parents saying..."one day you'll come to your senses" (referring to me opting not to go down the post grad route)...hours upon hours studying my favourite musicians etc.....It hurts me when i see people get on stage, call themselves musicians..and OBVIOUSLY have not rehearsed or simply sound bad......
Before i started making music i'd call a person i heard talking like this a music snob.....if that's what i am....that's what i am......but i left there last night annoyed to say the least...

So...i lied to him today....told him i 'enjoyed' it.....ah well...i'm going to check it out next week and if its the same thing..i'll definitely tell him something.....

Yeah...so that's it for tonite folks...it wednesday and it feels like friday...i'm that tired...can't believe i have 2 more days left....

Me and my joggin partner(s) are looking to do a big run this coming saturday morning by the way......We heading to the Palisadoes....for thos of you who don't know....its that 5 miles stretch of land about 100 metres wide connecting the airport to the rest of the island....It's gong to be beautiful watching the sun rise and joggin there....looking forward to that......I 've been slipping off the jogging of late...so i hope i'm fit enough to keep up wiht them....

anyways....good night folks..
be safe

Well....

2006-06-27T22:52:00.000-07:00

...the "great" day i should have had today..turned out to be an OK day......
The highlight was supposed to be linking with a guy at this music hangout spot tonite...I was to give him a cd with my stuff and talk about some of the stuff he's doing (really good shit)....
...but alas......he was a no show....had me sitting in this place filled with cigarette smoke and a few pretentious...wanna be hipsters......there were some cool cats there though..(hold on..did i just say cats?)......wasn't in a talking mood tonite...and didn't see anyone my spirit took to either....

Heard some ok sounding bands...and some others i wasn't felling at all.....
I left before the featured act was to perform....i was falling asleep.......been up from 3:30am...it's now 1:00am...plus i ran just under 4 miles after work this evening...

yeah...so i'm off to bed now.....tomorrow/later will be greater....

peace

I'll be back tomorrow...

2006-06-26T19:20:00.000-07:00

...Going to have a great day tomorrow....
I'll tell u all about it tomorrow night...

Another Day to Face...I'm Sharecroppin in this paper chase...

2006-06-21T21:46:00.000-07:00

.....take a deep breath and clear my database..."

THe immortal words of Phonte, one third of Little Brother...2 rappers and a producer who created one of my all time favourite albums The Listening.
This album will always be special to me...It came to me at a turing point in my life....early 2003....This album was my soundtrack for approximately 6 months...I had the cd in the car and played it EVERY morning on the way to work.....
What was so special about it u ask??....well these guys didn't seem like rap stars...they spoke about things i could relate to....
- balancing work and pursuing your passion
- the state of music at the time
- relationships
...and most of all the album was produced on some LOW budget equipment...when i found out about the program they used to put that album together...i thought to myself..."shit....i can really do this"....
I studied that album....found the original samples they used...re-created the beats....The Listening taught me so much......They also mentioned that the album was for people who actually listened to albums....y'know the people who bought cds/cassettes/vinyl rushed home.....waited for the right time....unwrapped the package...put on some headphones and sat back and listened.......Like most albums I think are classic...I felt they were actually talking to me....

Yeah....enuff nostalgia.....
I'm writing this from the desk at job #2.....It's an evening job i have at a medical centre a certain educational institution where i see basically students and staff.......I gave this post the title I did because days like today..i feel like i'm on a plantation.....lol...just working for somebody trying to get some $$......I'm grateful though.....the pay is decent and the conditions are pretty good....alot more than i can say for job#1......I'm basically working from 8-6pm 4 out of the 5 days this week....so the business things i have to sort out for the 'company' won't get done till friday........
Now to most people an 8-6 work day might seem too bad...and actually 3 years ago i would've jumped at the oppurtunity to work from 8-6 (back then I'd leave home for work some saturday mornings and not get back home till monday night).....but as i've grown to realize frustration, dissatisfaction and boredom can be alot more draining than physical labour......

Like most of my blogs....from here on in is being typed from home...(had to cut the earlier part short because they were closing the office).....It's now 11:55pm...the girls are asleep.....I'm about to lay the ground work for The Plan........now the plan, as i've hinted to you in the last post...or was it the one b4?....ah well.....is a project I'm working on.....that if properly executed and properly placed would really get me some musical work......

I'm starting to feel a bit sleepy...and have alot of work to do b4 i turn in......

Gotz to go.....

I know the last few entries have been a bit bland.....but i promise you....something big is around the corner....I don't know what it is.....but i feel something.....can't explain it...and part of me doesnt want to either....i just want to show u guys when it comes to pass......

I'm really beginning to ramble now....fatigue....

be good

It's been a long time....I shouldna left u.....

2006-06-19T18:52:00.000-07:00

....without a long blog to step to.....

Been a week.......Haven't posted cause i been busy...and i've been 'apartment watching' my sister's place while she's in South Africa....and her internet connection is down.....Plus a friend of ours from barbados has been staying here since last week...she sleeps out in the living room...which is where the modem is so.....y'know...

I've been good though...a lil tired, but good.....

Not much to report......Dealt with some business last week.....one more thing to do before the business is registered.....Track 63 Music is about to be born.....
I heard Steve Spacek say that business and music are like oil and water....they don't mix..yet they're so interwoven.....I find whenever I go into business mode (copyright, marketing, publishing etc..) my creativity gets zapped.....i guess that's what entertainment lawyers and managers are for huh??..it's a challenge i hear alot of musicians talk about......

I've been brainstorming this past week though.....trying to come up with some ways of getting this sound out there.....and i have an idea.....if it goes according to plan....2006 may just be THE year......won't let the cat out the bag yet.....but as time gets closer i'll share it with you guys....
THe thought gets me excited so I feel like it's going to work....

I finished touching up the tracks for that dub poetry group......going to call them tomorrow and let them hear the 'finished product'.....I slipped a cd to my neighbour who works with radio...to my suprise she said she not only liked it, but "gets it"....she said she "sees where i'm going with it".......NOw can i tell u.....whenever u create something...or at least when I do.....i'd love everybody to like it.....and when people do...and genuinely do...not just sayin the like it to be polite (i know those types...).....i get a certain lift when they do....but when someone says they UNDERSTAND or get where you're coming from /going with it it's a different feeling.....its a rush almost......and i'm really glad she gets it......
SHe says she has some shows (radio/tv) in the works and will definitely be linking me for some work.......
I'm grateful for that.....really am.....

Also another friend (who also reads this blog)....has a tv show in the works....and need some music...so i'm working on some stuff for her as welll.......

So things are moving....
......just need to treat eeach project like its my 1st and last at the same time.....

Signing out for now folks....

Hope y'all r well

Welcome to Jamrock

2006-06-12T22:03:00.000-07:00

...the title has absolutely nothing to do with this post, but I've been trying to incorporate song titles/lyrics into the titles....so i figured..what the hell
WHile i'm on the topic of welcome to jamrock.........i must say that i was one of the few jamaicans who thought the song was inappropriate....say what u will, but i think that young mr. marley kinda passed his place on that one...I mean..what he was saying is true..the video did highlight a section of jamaica that the average visitor (and alot of residents) don't see, BUT
I have 2 problems with that song.....first up....i must say...technically, musically its a great song..well produced well written.....
My problems:
1..Jr. Gong's reality is not Trench Town...his reality is not the so called ghetto....Yes his father may have been there, but he isn't.....to me the video seemed so contrived....this son of a beauty queen and a pop star (yes bob marley was a pop star...call him a prophet/revolutionary if u like, but at the end of the day he was a pop star.....and i mean that as no disrespect) walking thru this area nodding his head at residents talking about what "thugs will do to u"...

2..How does a song like that help to change the reality of the people living there......?? To me...poverty CAN NEVER be resolved by putting thoughts and visions of poverty into the minds of the rich, but by putting thoughts of wealth(not just financial), inspiration and hope into the minds of the poor....So to me...that song is just entertainment...nothing more...message??...nope....just an entertaining song.....I hear people saying all the time...that people need to hear songs about poverty and suffering....so they can know what's going on and in turn help those in need.....Honestly i think that's foolishness.......Don't get me wrong...if a musician has experienced that kind of living and feels a need to express it in song...cool...music is a form of expression.. but don't say it's a song to uplift your people....nobody can uplifted by hearing about poveryt and how bad things are..... nobody

Aight....lemme get off my high horse....and also i must say...i think damian marley is very talented...and i actually enjoyed his last album....there were some fillers, but on a whole it was a very solid effort...and u can see his growth as an artist....i look forward to hearing more new stuff from him...

Yeah....so what have i been up to musically since my last blog entry??...well...put together a mock podcast......I haven't used any special podcasting software...i'm trying to do it my way......
For those interested in how i did it....read on...for those not interested u can simply skip the next paragraph..lol

Aight....i created a playlist in iTunes....set the gap between each song to zero seconds so that the songs flow into one another.....I then added the playlist to my iPod.....Then..i plugged the iPod audio output into my audio/midi interface (which is attached to my laptop via USB)....I opened my software of choice (FL studio6) and pressed play...recording the audio from the iPod as a wav file into a track in FL studio...here's where a few glitches came up...there were some jumps and clicks in the recorded audio....(i think i know how to get around that).....
After the audio was saved I plugged in my 'mic' (remind me to tell u why i put mic in ' ' )....into the audio interface...and recorded my voice while playing back the tracks i recorded earlier......
I divided the vocal tracks into small segments....not only is it less CPU intensive...it gives me time to edit and redo segments that didn't come out right...as opposed to having to erase and re-record the entire vocal track....
I had to do alot of eq-ing and filtering to the vocal track because of the poor quality of my 'mic'....but it came out sounding aight..not pristine, but audible and not annoying....
After that i exported the entire session as an mp3 file (bitrate of 192)......
NOw i'm sure there's an easier way to do this, but i don't care...I'm doing it my way (c) Frank Sinatra...(that's who sang that song right??)

Next step...to check out those free podcast creating software packages out there and see if they can offer me anything that my way doesn't
After that i have to go thru ALL the music i was offered to put up...

For now i plan to do a show every 2 weeks....
I also have a treat in store for listeners.....something to give them an incentive to tune in each fortnight......the treats are geared mainly to music fans and aspiring musicians/producers..

Yeah....so that's what i've been up to....
Was planning to create a new track tonite, but it's 12:25am and i'm tired.....think i'm about to turn in....

Didn't call the guy today...going to do it tomorrow....

My sister is enroute to South Africa as i type this....she's going for a 'conference', but if u know her like i do......she's not going for the academia....We get to keep her vehicle while she's gone...so it frees up me and D alot......the one car thing may be better than no car, but hey 2 cars are indeed better than 1.....

More non-music stuff.....Went joggin this evening..(couldn't get up at 5 this morning...went to bed too late last night)......I just don't get it though??......Is running becoming fashionable now....I never realized that so many people jog......its almost like a movement down here....I'm wondering if its jsut because I've started doing it..that i now notice people doing it.....i dunno...i mean the place we jogged today was swarming with people man.....
I even saw this woman joggin with makeup on.....makeup.....blush..lipstick..eye-liner....i kid u not.....talk about keeping it real....lol...lemme stop being judgemental......

Also our little girl turns 1 on the 15th of June...thursday....
Exactly one year ago....actually one year and 3 hours ago...i got a call from barbados...."my water broke".....4 hours after that i called my supervisor and told her i had to leave the island that morning.....10 hours later I was rubbing a tummy......about 48 hours after that I was holding a teeny 5lb 2 ounce baby girl......6 hours ago that teeny baby was putting my cell phone to her ear (upside down mind you) saying "GAH....GAH".....
TIme flies sooo fast...b4 i know it she'll be telling me how old school and uncool i am....
A friend asked me a while back..."how has being a father changed u"......it kinda stumped me for a second cause honestly...i've almost forgotten life without her......but thinking some more.....fatherhood has made me a LITTLE more patient..lol....has made me take my health more seriously...cause there's someone on this earth who depends on me right now...so i have to be around.....there're lots of other changes, but time doesn't permit me to go into all that...plus this post is getting too long...i'm sure i've lost more than half the people who started reading it already....

Yeah....so that's it 4 tonite then....
be good and be safe

If I could turn back time

2006-06-11T22:07:00.000-07:00

...i actually never liked that song back in the day....but its on my mind tonite, because i reaally wish i could turn back time...

b4 i go any further....be warned..it's 12:27am...i'm tired as hell...so any bad grammar, bad spelling...and incoherent babbling....please forgive me..

If you've been following my story...u'd know i recently submitted a cd with 9 instrumentals to the Redbull Music Academy..for them to listen to and along with my application form..decide whether or not they plan to choose me for this years academy in Melbourne...

I created 2 beeeeeeeeeautiful beats last week.......now...I'm not one to blow my own horn, but they were good.....I think they captured that feeling i was talking about in an earlier blog....
I wish i could have sent these 2 to the academy.....

One is a simple 3 chord progression on piano....3 minor7 chords.....with a sine lead doing some walking up and down the matching minor 7 scales.....with a repetitive haunting piano going back and forth....with some loud drums underneath......(i know this doesn't make sense to some of you, but I feel like showing off tonite.....lol...i always find it cool when i hear people talking confidently about shit i know nothing about....so tonite is my nite to do that to some of y'all)....

The other one is a bob marley 'remix'....i chopped the intro to Natty Dread...and looped the I-Threes singin....placed some congas underneath it..added a loud snare....then i rearranged the chopped pieces into a.......lemme stop....
I like it......if u'd like to hear the Bob Marley one....let me know and i'll send it to u privately...

On another note...was supposed to meet with a pretty famous Jamaican musician yesterday (saturday).....was planning to play some of my stuff to him...get some feedback...and find out if he knew of any vocalist/musician who's doing something similar to what i'm doing......He was supposed to have come over to our apartment, but he didn't show.....tried calling....voice mail....
PArt of me feels he's giving me the run around, but the other, more sensible part of me says..he a musician they're busy people.......
So i'm kinda stuck......well not really but....anyway......my pride/shyness/insecurity is preventing me from calling him.....hopefully i'll wake up tomorrow morning feeling invincible...and call him and arrange another meeting.....

Y'know...its funny....i've always heard people say..."you're the only person who can hold u back or cause u to succeed".....i don't think i understood that fully until recently......
Now.....I'm a firm believer in the power of thought....not just positve thinking, but negative thinking....
I believe we atttract whatever we spend most of our waking hours thinking about....and the people who live the life they want to live are the ones who are able to keep their minds focussed on what they want and not on what they don't want.....i'm not saying they think positve thoughts all day...and a negative thought neevr enters their minds, but they don't DWELL on the negative ones.....
I'm sayin all that to say......since i've started making a concious effort to control my thoughts and focussing on where i want to take this music....all kinds of oppurtunities started coming my way....
-meeting someone who introduces me to a internationally known songwriter producer here in JA
-meeting the same msucian who stood me up at the airport
-getting the oppurtunity to work at one of the summer's biggest music festivals
-my sister giving me a link with another famous jamaican dub poet/DJ
...i could go on and on.....alot more things have 'fallen' into my lap....

But as i've read b4 "by thought...what u want is attracted to you, but by personal action u prepare to and actually receive what it is u want"......
I've been doing ok with the thought part, but i've been slacking on the action half of the equation...I mean...sometimes fear and insecurity literally cripple me...,,...not as bad as it did say 5-6 years ago, but it slows me down.....I spoke on some of those 'blocks' last blog.....

I mean...i'm not sitting here typing this saying that i'm doomed and will never get over these hurdles...but this is just where i am right now....at 12:49am monday june 12 2006...
Tomorrow's a new day......yep

On yet another note......i haven't been running much lately....i don't know, but i was just LAZY for the month of May.....then i went and injured my hamstring......nothing major...felt like a sprain/strain whatever the sports physicians call it.....I went for a mile run friday mornin..took it slow...and it felt good...I'm back....So we're hitting the road tomorrow/this morning at 5:00am...which is in just a few hours...which means i should've been asleep a few hours ago....

....and tha-tha-tha-that's all folks....

Have a great week

Oh...major projects for this week.....??
-Finish registering the business
-Put together a mock podcast and see how it feels...
-Make 4 new beats....
-Listen to the following albums i 'stole' from my father's collection:( jpe sample and the soul commitee.."did u feel that?"; Return to Forever--"romantic warrior")

g'nite people

Commitment

2006-06-06T20:48:00.000-07:00

...Commitment is a word I've been thinking about alot lately....
According to the Encarta msn dictionary, it means "loyalty: devotion or dedication, e.g. to a cause, person, or relationship" (I'm at work...it's the 1st dictionary i found when i googled the word dictionary)...

Yeah....i'm not referring to relationships, or people this time....but to a cause....
The cause i'm talking about is.....u guessed it....MUSIC...

Now as some of you know I've been actively making music for 2+ years now...started late '03....I've been telling close friends and myself that I "want to make music".....the other day it hit me.....Am I REALLY committed to making music.....i mean...do I really WANT this...am i/have i been doing all I can to make this thing real....
Being honest with myself...i've been dragging my feet....
There're several reasons for this:

1. I'm a doctor.....somewhere in the back of my mind I believe what most Caribbean people believe....Doctors are mini-gods....having the Dr is a gift that some poeple would kill for...How dare I give that up to become a worthless musician....
2. Other musicians won't take me seriously because I haven't 'paid my dues'..i was never (and i don't plan on being) a starving artist.....i'm not rolling in money, but i'm comfortable....we live in a comfortable apartment, drive a reliable car, have clothes...not worrying about the next meal...u get the picture.
3. I think by pursuing music wholeheartedly, I'll be giving up my true calling..medicine.....
4. I don't know enough about music to hang with and be respected by 'real' musicians....

....there're other things, but that'll be sharing a lil too much with y'all....we don't know each other well enough yet... ;-)

#1 is really a stupid reason.....and that thinking that we have as a people..regarding doctors comes from colonial days when doctors were these great white men who came from the mother country to heal us.....so i threw that one out....
#2 is also stupid....it comes from a place of insecurity...having been around artists and musicians before and hearing them snob people attempting to learn their craft in ways or thru avenues they never went down......fk them if thats what they think.....so that one's out too...
#3 is a hard one to shake...the question every man or woman asks themselves at some point in their lives..."what have i been placed on this earth to do?...what is my calling?".....to me your calling can't be something you do because you're afraid that if u don't do it you'll be unfullfilled......that's acting out of fear...I want to do something because I want to...because i love and am energized by the feeling it brings...not because i'm fearful of what would happen if i don't do it......So if i were to abandon this musical quest right now...it would be out of fear that pursuing it would make me miss something where medicine is concerned.....so i've thrown that one out too..
#4 My knowledge of music isn't where i want it to be....but i think i've come a looong way in two years....and that's two years while working full time, and having an 11month old daughter at home....so that's out...

So where does that leave me??....well.....back to the word of the day..commitment.....
Stick a pin...

y'know its funny....this is just coming to me as i write this......I met with a famous guitarist the other day.....and was playing some of my music for him...trying to get feedback.....he seemed impressed and told me he liked it, but he said to me.."u don't sound like committed to this thing"....he wasn't talking about how I spoke...he was referring to the music....He said i sounded like i was trying to be safe...he said he could see where i wanted to go, but i was holding back....sitting on the fence....not wanting to step out the box.......

He was right......i haven't committed to this music....as much as i love it and want to do it full time....i've been playing it safe up to this point...
Now i'm not saying this is a lightning bolt/light bulb type revelaltion, but i'm seeing things a bit different now.....and i plan to act different too....

From today...i will pursue music like someone committed to it.....I will explore every avenue i have available to me.....i will treat each prject (no matter how minor it seems) as if I'm producing the next Bjork album.....
i know i know.......it sounds dramatic, but that's me.....as a certain young lady knows all too well....i can be a very dramatic young lad...lol
but to this.....

I think that's what's been missing....commitment..

I hope y'all are committed to whatever you're doing.....

Peace

There's so much more to life than.....

2006-06-04T19:13:00.000-07:00

......living your dreams....
Alot of shit gets in the middle....alot of unneccessary, self-imposed, missunderstood, repetitive, knee jerk bullshit...

....that's why I haven't been posting as much....

I'll be back. (c) Arnold

Oh and....happy anniversary mom and daddy...31 years and counting...

Feelin better today...

2006-05-31T20:46:00.000-07:00

...ok lemme explain 1st....the previous post was actually written last night (tues..may 30th), but for wahtever reason...i haven't been able to post till tonite....

NOw...i ended the last post sayin...that usually after feeling so low...something usually happens to pick me up.....Today was no exception....

Got to work......had an ok day.....left at 2...jetted to the other job at 3.....left at 6....was feeling ok...went to pay some bills...and on leaving saw this friend i hadn't seen in years......I was feeling really antisocial..so i kept the windows up and kept driving....pulled up in front the supermarket to buy some stuff to cook for lunch tomorrow.....

As soon as i walk in...said friend taps me on the shoulder..."i wasn't coming here to shop...just saw u and had to say hello".......Now here is where things get all Celestine Prophecy-ish......(if u don't know celetstine prophecy was the original boho manual of the mid-late 90s.......lol...i'm playing...the book changed my life for real....)...anyways...so i'm looking at her...like..."damn...i intentionally ignored her and her she comes running me down......she must have something for me..." Soo i go into my receptive mode....just asking about what she's up to....
She's a lawyer by the way...really eccentric young woman....obviously brilliant, gives off a clueless vibe sometimes....i've always liked her......She tells me she's not happy with what she's doing and is throwing it all in the wind to pursue her passion...(another type of law)........I ask her about her boyfriend...who's also a lawyer...same thing...he's getting out of waht he's doing to follow is dream....(entertainment law)....she goes on to tell me that he manages this group and working on some shit for them....
I slip in that I'm pushing this music now and trying to ease out of medicine......she tells me "u need to hook up with my boyfriend"
Now...i've been looking (well not really....just quietly wishing) for a lawyer..versed in copyright, publishing etc for a while now......and he seems PERFECT.......

We exchanged numbers and I"m supposed to get back to them this weekend.....

It's days like this that makes me feel I'm not alone...like i'm being guided...like i'm on the right track.......

Anyways...its 11pm now.....i need to go to bed....

be good

Juss one a dem days

2006-05-31T20:44:00.000-07:00

...the one day I'm rushin to get online to blog the server's down and I can't post anything...I'm actually typing this as a draft and will cut and paste it to "From riches to..." tomorrow morning...

I posted a request for music for the podcast on okayplayer.com and got alot more responses than i expected....If they all sound 'good'....i have more than enough material for the 1st 2 shows......Oh AF...i'm looking to start late june/early july....why u ask though?....

According to fedex.com the redbull package is in Frankfurt Germany right now...should get to Cologne by midday tomorrow....(may31st).....my baby's almost there...
enuff of the good stuff....

Today (yesterday...tuesday may30) was one of those days...

Y'know those days when u just want to curl up inot a ball and cry like an 11 and a half monther...

Those days when u feel so drained you can't even think straight....

Those days when the u feel 'funny' when u see your former classmates driving by you in their 2005 Altezzas...and you're pushing a 1996 Baleno...

Those days when u actually feel bad when someone u used to work with asks you..."hey aren't u coming back?...u were so good up there..everybody misses you"....

Those days when u almost don't believe yourself when u reply.."naw...i'm good...with this job i don't work nights, I have weekends off, i can spend more time with my family and on music..although the pay is less...i'm cool"..

Those days when u wonder if you'll wake up one day 10 years down the road and realize you've wasted the last decade...

Those days when u want to call in sick, but can't cause there's no one to replace you...and the patients u don't see today will come tomorrow and make tomorrow's workload even crazier...

Those days when u know u should be grateful for all you have, but u don't give a %$&#...u just want to sulk...

Those days when u want to go for a run, but can't because you're recovering from a hamstring/calf injury....

Those days when u want to make music, but the only thing u can push out is stuff that sounds like other people's work...

I mean.....don't get me wrong folks...i'm grateful for where I am now...i mean I'm healthy, I'm not in debt, I have a family, I have 2 jobs..I know what i want to do with my life...I have a plan...well kinda have a plan.....
just feeling low today...things just seem harder....responsibilites feel like burdens....work seems like torture...food tastes bad....lol...u get the picture....

It's days like this I feel like packing up and pulling out them US Board exams books.....studying for year....moving to the states joining a residency program, coming back to the caribbean and overcharge patients and live happily ever after......I need to sell those books...not only is it a quick $US 400....it'll get rid of any temptation to go back down that road...lol

Funny thing is though..i find whenever I get this low....something big is usually waiting for me around the corner...may be something tangible (a phone call, email, chance meeting) or a realization, a memory that triggers some emotion that lifts me up, a bassline for a track i go on to put together.....something..
So....tonite...i'm going to bed early (10:30)...expecting something good to come my way tomorrow.....

Be safe y'all

..with truth in the music..who could refuse it....

2006-05-29T19:44:00.000-07:00

...who keep the fuse lit??..new shit??...wanna walk the walk?...then make sure your shoes fit...
Words from the late J-Dilla...

Finally sent off the Redbull music academy applilcation by fedex today....was on my way to fedex few days ago, and just decided to play the cd in a discman that was in the car.....the shit was skipping like crazy....I immediately turned around and headed home...Wouldn't have made it back before they closed so I double and triple checked everything and sent it off today...
I feel a lot lighter now.....Watching the fedex agent put it in the envelope and seal it made me feel funny...I mean this is the 1st time I'm letting strangers here my music without me being there to see their initial reactions......Its something I better get used to though...and fast..

I'm really glad I applied....filling out the questionnaire really brought out a lot of feelings/thoughts i had, but never expressed...

I found myself asking myself things like..."why do i REALLY want to do this?"..."Is this just a phase?"....."what if everybody else is right and I"m wrong?"....
Then that quiet 'voice' I'm learning to listen to whispered..."c'mon man....don't u remember that 'feelin' u felt when u 1st heard your favourite albums?....that's why you're doing this...cause u get the same feeling when you're making music...u want to give others that feeling"......

This 'feeling' i'm referring to is hard to explain......it's a sense of invincibilty, vunerability, flight, fall, dark, light, wet, dry, tight, loose, hot, cold, sweaty, shivering all at the same time..

Switching gears now....
What's the next stop on this journey??....Podcast....I'm setting up a podcast....Have a couple names in mind....It will feature music from unsigned artists, beatmakers, DJs.....each show will average 30mins in length...I plan to open and close each episode with my music...Initially I'll post a show every 2 weeks...but when the supply of new music picks up...I'll start making it weekly...
At some point I want to do interviews, but my current setup doesn't permit that....
Promises to be a good show.......Stay tuned...

My other/better-half/grlfriend/significant other/wife/girlfriend/mother of mychild is doing this filmmaking workshop this summer and they have to come with a short film at the end of it.....we were talking about ideas today....and she has something in mind...won't let the cat out the bag, but i'm excited about it....not just because it sounds good, but because I'm making some music for it......it's going to be nice working together on something.....we have things in common, but our worlds can seem so polar at times....and doing this thing together feels special already...

I got a call the other day from a woman I used to work with...she's responsible for putting together a medical team for one of the big music festivals this summer....she called me to ask if i'd be interested in coming on board.....I said yes without thinking twice....I'm going to have to miss 2 days from work....It's not going to be easy to get the days off......i don't care....if it means calling in sick...that's what i'm goign to do....
I'm going to be surrounded by musicians/producers/dj/agents/managers from JA and overseas for 4 days....what's there to think about??
...on top of that, the proposed pay looks pretty good...**i see new software and a computer upgrade in my future**.....that's not for another few months, but i'll keep y'all up to speed on that one......
Stay tuned..

Still haven't called the saxophonist i was supposed to meet with last week.....

This was taken yesterday at Calabash....was beautiful, but HOT....the heat was....hot...i haven't felt that kinda heat in a while....
Sonia Sanchez was the highlight for me.....72 years old???...the woman is amazing....I'm not into poetry as much i was say 5/6 years ago, but she blew me away.....she signed a book for our daughter....she can't read yet, but we thought it'd be cool for her to have a book signed by sonia sanchez... Bought a book too.
Oh......for those of you who don't know about calabash..its an annual literary festival held in Jamaica....u can check them out here...
www.calabashfestival.org

God bless...and good nite

4am once again..

2006-05-24T03:29:00.000-07:00

...yeah so...i went to bed at 9:45 last night....set the alarm for 3:45 this morn....tossed and turned for 15 mins..got up at 4...felt good....mentally planned the day...sat in front of the computer and got to work...

The cd for the redbull music academy is complete...for those of you who don't know the RBMA is a yearly event (been going on about 6 years now) sponsored by redbull (the energy drink). They choose 30 people from all over the world..gather them in a city for a week of panel discussions and seminars by famous and not so famous musicians...They pay for your airfare and accomodation. This year it's in Melbourne Austrailia.. This is my 1st time applying. The experience would be great....meeting up with other like minded and not so like minded musicians/DJs/producers in a place I've never been before...

So part of the application process is submitting a CD of your work....I've spent the last month or so going through ALL my tracks fine tuning the ones I want to send...I narrowed it down to 9...
Why 9?...well 9 to me represents completion and perfect order, but more importantly I think these 9 tracks represent the different sides to my beat making.

I've sequenced the cd in such a way that it starts with 2 tracks showing where I've gotten my inspiration...the other 7 highlight my sound.
There's the chopped up jazz sample hip hop thing...(ala Premiere)...then the old soul sample thing ala J Dilla...then there's 'my shit'....the sound I'm trying to develop...It incorporates sampling (some don't)...but it has alot of congas/bongos....some nice full chords, nice ambient pads, lush basslines...Most importantly they all set a mood or tell a story....I like them...The people i play them to like them...Let's hope those redbull people get it...

The application form itself is like 14-15 pages...questions ranging from "when was the last time you cried?" to "how would u explain to your grandparents what it is you do (re: music) and what motivates you?"....I find myself trying to analyse what they're trying to get from you from each question...lol....must be the ex-psyche resident in me....ah well....
I'm constantly editing my answers wanting them to be 'perfect'.......i will complete it today...and mail the package to them by friday...

Anyone reading this and interested in attending the RBMA go to www.redbullmusicacademy.com . All applications have to be postmarked by June 3.

Have great day my people...

Smile with the rising sun......

2006-05-23T05:12:00.000-07:00

.....no birds at my doorstep though....

Fell asleep last night.....
Got nothing done.....lol
No work today so that's a good thing...
Been up for an hour now.....chose the tracks I'm sending....fine tuned them...took me half an hour to do that...I feel sooo much more efficient in the morning

Between today and tomorrow I'm going to design a cd label with the tracklist and burn them to said disc....

Being honest with myself...I don't think i can touch the tracks for the poets till this weekend...they won't be pleased, but i can't please everybody..

It's a beautiful morning too....cool, crisp and quiet..it's labour day....everybody's sleeping late...feeels like a Sunday

Sleep Cycles

2006-05-22T20:04:00.000-07:00

...For 7-8 months after our daughter's birth my days started at 4am....I'd sleep with my cell phone in my pyjama pocket..set it to vibrate at 3:45...toss and turn for 15 minutes then get up...
I'd use those early morning hours 4-6am to work on this music....It was working perfectly...4am is perfect.....quiet, cool, my mind would be fresh....

..something happened about 3 months ago....It was getting harder and harder to get up at 4....
A few things contributed to that though:
1. I was going to bed alot later..instead of being in bed by 9 I'd find myself going in at 11..12..1
2. I started running in the mornings (5:30/6-ish)
3. The nights have been getting hotter..hence harder for me to fall asleep as early

So i decided to switch things up....working on music after the girls have gone to sleep.....It just hasn't been the same....In the hours leading up to midnite...i'm hearing the neighbours tv, cars driving by, dogs barking, some street dance in the distance...At this hour I'm also not very creative.....
I just feel like my sleep cycle is totally fked up right now...

So it's now 10:28pm and they're asleep....just kissed my gf good nite...I feel like my day's just starting now....soo much to do tonite....
-FINALLY decide which tracks I'm sending to the Redbull people and fine tune them
-Complete the application form
-Start fine tuning 2 tracks for this group of dub poets.....
Part of me wants to jsut say to hell with it..and just go out on the balcony, light up and listen to some Weather Report till I fall asleep....
....but no...there's work to be done....

On another note...we were watching Oprah's Legend's Ball this evening...and D said something that hit me for real......"say what u will about Opera.....this is the first time I'm seeing someone honouring black women on prime time television.....That's powerful"....those won't her exact words, but the jist of what she said......It's true though...i mean I"ve been looking at Ms Winfrey a little differently of late....from topics on her show, to comments I've heard her make; to how she's treated ceertain guests......but what i saw tonite was powerful.....

Hats/tams off to u Oprah